MORE TIPS FOR REDNECKS:
When decanting wine, make sure that you tilt the paper cup and pour slowly so as not to "bruise" the fruit of the vine.
If drinking directly from the bottle, always hold it with your fingers covering the label.
ENTERTAINING IN YOUR HOME
A centerpiece for the table should NEVER be prepared by a taxidermist.
Do NOT allow the dog to eat at the table ... no matter how good his manners are.