Flowers are abloomin in June!

Guess who's had 3 showers since 2 pm today? What is it with little boys and mud?

Just in case you've had a rough day, here is a stress management technique recommended in all the latest psychological texts. The funny part is that it really works.
1. Picture yourself near a stream.

2. Birds are softly chirping in the cool mountain air.

3. No one but you knows your secret place.

4. You are in total seclusion from the hectic world.

5. The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity.

6. The water is crystal clear.

7. And you can easily make out the face of the person you're holding under the water.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

On Adventuresome Urges.

I am quite sure that it's my age and the suspicion that I'd better cram a lot of "want tos" into the last half of my life that has made me much more adventuresome than I was during the first half of my life. Of course something about raising 3 kids does things to all of the urges that might try to raise their heads too (if they dared!). So it was in my 43rd year that I first smoked pot (and my last, I might add), my 44th year that I crewed for a hot-air balloonist and spotted for him while my daughter and my Soony (my Dutch kid) went up for their first flight, and my 45th year that I hopped my big ole ass up onto the wing of a crop duster and took my first ride in the jumpseat to take some wonderful photos! Now, if they'd only let me take a ride on that space shuttle,, I'd die with a smile!!


A photo of our old house that I took from the crop duster

Whew, it's been a tough day already. Zach had a dentist appointment at 10:45 this morning so I waited until the last minute to wake him up for breakfast and his bath. Then I had to deal with this grumpy, I don't want Captain Crunch-the bath water is too cold-why do I have to wear shoes-but we can't leave while "Courage the Cowardly Dog" is on- whining this morning from the 6-yr-old terrorist.

We finally got out of the house around 10:15 and once we made it to the appointment, they were about 45 minutes behind. Zach finally gets his turn in the chair and right off the bat the dentist hurts him, so the work that should have taken 45 minutes took an extra half hour (he really did hurt him, the shots didn't take). That trip cost me a new computer game and lunch at McDonalds (which I HATE).

On the ride home, I was aching so bad that I finally picked up the cell and made an appointment to see my doc tomorrow afternoon. I know the time has come when I have to rest after vacuuming the living room or a trip to the dentist! I have way too much to do to let this keep going on so I'm going to march in there tomorrow and tell him to either fix me up or shoot me, whichever is cheaper!!

My son, the accident waiting to happen, and his wife and their friends decided to go on a short vacation this past week. Usually, their annual pilgrimage to the wilderness is to go up to Spring River in North Central Arkansas and do a short canoe trip and camp, but this year, they decided to try the Buffalo River in NW Arkansas. They all left early Wednesday morning with tents, one raft, and innertubes, and I didn't hear from them again until they were on their way home yesterday.

The phone rang around noon and it was Jerri telling me that they were on their way home. I asked about their trip and then she told me that she didn't care of they filled in Buffalo river!!! We talked a few more minutes and I told her to just hurry home cause I couldn't wait to hear the story behind those words.

They were too tired to come by on their way home so my son called last night to tell me a little of their adventure. He said their trip was great, they swam, they floated a little, made one trip to civilization for beer and extra supplies, and were having a great time. They'd left the long float for their last full day so they all got up Saturday and caught their ride to their starting point 20 miles up river. My son kept asking why it was so far since it was only supposed to be a 6 hr float trip. His friend told him that highway miles are different from river miles. Well it seems that they are, but they went just a little too far for a 6 hr float.

James the day started out nice, everyone was floating on innertubes except for one couple who had a raft. They had a cooler with beer and water, cameras and a few food items in water proof pails and baggies. 6hrs came and went and they kept coming to parts of the river that were so shallow that they'd have to pick up their floats and carry them across the rocks. Soon the women became so exhausted that in the deeper parts the guys tied ropes around their waists and were swimming and pulling them down river. Two of the friends were single guys and they had floated ahead of the others when they'd made a stop on the bank to rest and relieve themselves. James said the didn't get too worried until it started to get dark in the wilderness. With the limestone walls on each side of the river it made it pitch black and they couldn't see anything, didn't know where they were, had no idea how far Jeremy and Tristan had gotten ahead of them, so exhausted, sunburned, with scraped knees and feet from the rocks, they finally decided that they had to stop and wait for daylight to continue.

It had cooled to about 65 degrees F by then and they were all in wet swimsuits so they decided the first thing they needed to do was build a fire (they figured that would keep all the wild critters away as well). The three guys gathered some wood and worked for about an hour trying to get a fire started. Finally, my son said, "I guess Jerri got tired of our fumbling around, so my little firebug wife gathered her own wood and while we were struggling we noticed we had light, I turned around to look and she had a blaze going!" He continued on with his story to tell me that they'd nearly frozen their asses off, he and the other two husbands got NO sleep because the women didn't want to be eaten by some wild critter and kept waking them up to find wood to feed the fire. They were also worried about the two guys who'd gone ahead because they didn't know if they had the means with which to light a fire.

At some point in the early morning hours, they heard their friends yelling for them from the bluffs above the river, they yelled back but because they were down in a hollow, the friends didn't hear them. Their friends had made it back to camp and we worried when they hadn't shown up behind them and after a couple of hours, they'd found a park ranger and had gathered 6 other campers to look for them.

James said that they decided at 5:30 am, that they were going to find their way out, no matter what, but were not going to get back into that river. They started hiking along the bank and had gone less than 300 yards when they came upon another camp site. He said they guy must have thought that they were insane when a group of yelling, bedraggled people came running at him, but the guy (a man from Australia) was kind enough to drive them to their camp. He said they were pretty embarrassed that they'd been lost only 300 yards from a camp site, but the kicker was when they got to their camp and found out that they had only been 2 miles from it!

Everything turned out well in the end although 15 people went without sleep on Saturday night (the 6 lost and 9 searchers), and they were all scratched and bruised and tired. Needless to say, he didn't share my enthusiasm about his great adventure and his last words, before he hung up from our chat were, "Fuck the Buffalo River."

Jerri has promised to send photos to my email soon and let me scan some of the ones from the other camera so as soon as she does I'll share them here.

I've been thinking about my brother, Roger, for the past few days. My two sisters and I only have half brothers. My father has 4 sons with his second wife and my mother had Roger around the same time she and my father divorced. Roger died at age 31 and the day of his funeral was the last time I've spoken more than a few words to my father. Parts of my life read like the script of a soap opera but the short and sweet of it is that Roger was not one of my father's sons.

I was so angry with my mother when my brother died because I knew that he'd lived his short life never knowing who his father was.

I loved my brother.

I'm sitting here with my first cup of coffee of the day and wondering where my spring fling inspiration went. The past couple of days I just haven't been able to concentrate for very long on anything.

Yesterday, my oldest daughter came by for a couple of hours. She came with a friend who was attending a wedding so I had a little time with Jordan and Jaylen. I was the happy recipient of sweet kisses and cutie-pie hugs. I don't get to see these granddaughters as much as I'd like to, so I try to make the most of these times.

Jordan, age 5, Jaylen, age 1 1/2

I got one very welcome and very needed thing today. That Special K called me twice and gave me plenty to smile about and we also had a chat in IM.

I don't quite know how to do a Friday Five. How does one come up with the questions?

So I'm going to try to do a "What Brenda Needs Today" list and hopefully someone will give me instructions on the Friday Five soon (grin).

WHAT BRENDA NEEDS TODAY!

**Energy to do what needs doing.

**Patience

**The ability to "fix things" that go wrong.

**Peace

**As much time as needed to just be alone.

**To be first sometimes

**The ability to say what I feel without upsetting someone

**To see my sisters more than I do

I'm really very tired, and when I am this tired, I'm a bitch.

My youngest daughter only lives a few miles from me. She is Zach's mother and the mother of 3 of the little granddaughters. She lost her job a few weeks ago and she's been to visit almost every day since. Even when I'm not at home she visits and calls me in my truck, from MY house, asking me where I am.

I feel like a prisoner and my kids are the wardens. I am grumpy so I'm gonna hush now.

Yep, I tend to agree with this,,,,,

(Forrest has made a correction)


"Life isn't like a box of chocolates...it's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today might burn your ass tomorrow."

My cousin, Gordon, has been kind again today.

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?"

Dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm
the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism.
Your Mom, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call
her the Government. We're here to take care of your needs, so
we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the
Working Class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the
Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,"

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had
said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so
he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely
soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents' room
and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her,
he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks
in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He
gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I
think I understand the concept of politics now."

The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you
think politics is all about."

The little boy replies, "Well, while Capitalism is screwing
the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People
are being ignored and the Future is in deep shit."

Would you believe I'm paying bills??

*****Abie in May*****


*****Abie, Krysten, Merikate*****


*****PopPop*****

Zach's youngest little sister is Abie, aged 2. She's learning to talk and sounds just like a little magpie. The last few weeks we've been having some pretty intense conversations.

Nanny: "What's your name little girl?"
Abie: "Meri Katherine" (this is one of her sister's names)

Nanny: "No, No, your name is Abie." "Who are you?"
Abie: "Meri Katherine"

Nanny: " My name is Nanny. Your name is ?"
Abie: "Meri Katherine"

Finally, after about 2 weeks of this,,,,

Nanny: "What is your name?"
Abie: "Abie"

Nanny: "Yeaaa,,,GOOD GIRL!!"
" How old are you?"
Abie: "Meri Katherine"

Nanny: (under her breath) "ohshit, here we go again."

Andy Rooney Humor

Monica
Can you believe it? Monica turned 28 recently. It seems like only yesterday she was crawling around the White House on her hands and knees

Vegetarians
"Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning 'lousy hunter'"

Prisoners
Did you know that it costs forty-thousand dollars a year to house each prisoner? Jeez, for forty-thousand bucks apiece I'll take a few prisoners into my house. I live in Los Angeles. I already have bars on the windows. I don't think we should give free room and board to criminals. I think they should have to run twelve hours a day on a treadmill and generate electricity. And if they don't want to run, they can rest in the chair that's hooked up to the generator.

Fabric Softener
My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for. Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under their breath, "Married!" and walking away. Fabric Softeners are how our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes.

Morning Differences
Men and women are different in the morning. We men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, 'How can he want me the way I look in the morning?' It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.

Phone-In-Polls
You know those shows where people call in and vote on different issues? Did you ever notice there's always like 18% that say "I don't know." It costs 90 cents to call up and vote and they're voting "I don't know." Honey, I feel very strongly about this. Give me the phone. (Says Into Phone) "I DON'T KNOW!" (Hangs up looking proud.) Sometimes you have to stand up for what you believe you're not sure about." This guy probably calls up phone sex girls for $2.95 a minute to say, "I'm not in the mood."

Cripes
My wife's from the Midwest. Very nice people there. Very wholesome. They use words like 'Cripes'. 'For Cripe's sake.' Who would that be; Jesus Cripe's? The son of 'Gosh' of the church of 'Holy Moly'? I'm not making fun of it. You think I wanna burn in 'Heck'?

Grandma
My grandmother has a bumper sticker on her car that says, 'Sexy Senior Citizen.' You don't want to think of your grandmother that way, do you? Out entering wet shawl contests. Makes you wonder where she got that dollar she gave you for your birthday.

Answering Machines
Did you ever hear one of these corny, positive messages on someone's answering machine? "Hi, it's a great day and I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is: "Share the love." Beep. "Uh, yeah...this is the VD clinic calling....Speaking of being positive, your test results are back. Stop sharing the love."

Research
Because over the past few years, more money has been spent on breast implants and Viagra than is spent on Alzheimer's Disease research, it is believed that by the year 2030 there will be a large number of people wandering around with huge breasts and erections...who can't remember what to do with them!

****Smiles by Timm

Navajo Wisdom

About 1966 or so, a NASA team doing work for the Apollo moon mission took the astronauts to a location near Tuba City where the terrain of the Navajo Reservation looks very much like the Lunar surface. Along with all the trucks and large vehicles, there were two large figures dressed in full Lunar spacesuits.

Nearby a Navajo sheep herder and his son were watching the strange creatures walk about, occasionally being tended by personnel. The two Navajo people were noticed and approached by the NASA personnel. Since the man did not know English, his son asked for him what the strange creatures were and the NASA people told them that they are just men that are getting ready to go to the moon.

The man became very excited and asked if he could send a message to the moon with the astronauts. The NASA personnel thought this was a great idea so they rustled up a tape recorder. After the man gave them his message, they asked his son to translate. His son would not.

Later, they tried a few more people on the reservation to translate and every person they asked would chuckle and then refuse to translate.

Finally, with cash in hand, someone translated the message, "Watch out for these guys, they come to take your land."

I'm on my way out the door to meet a friend for lunch, but thought I'd post a little before I leave.

Usually my take of the daily news broadcasts is "Around the World in 80 Seconds". I figure that anything worth knowing will be in that and besides, it's short and to the point. But for some reason last night, I wasn't deep enough into my book when hubby turned on the news to wait for the local weather. The top stories were:

Police have pressed murder charges against the mother of an 8-month-old boy who was brought to the hospital with a fractured skull and ribs.
Lisa Marie Butler, 18, of Memphis was charged Friday with first-degree murder in the perpetration of aggravated child abuse. Police said she confessed to the killing.
Child Welfare is under investigation in this case also because the child had been reportedly abused in the past and their findings at that time concluded that it had been accidental.
Butler also revealed in the hearing held today, that she was currently 3 months pregnant with her second child.

Chante Mallard, a 27-year-old nurse's aide, is accused of striking Gregory Glenn Biggs, a homeless man, with her car as she drove home from a friend's apartment along U.S. 287 near the Loop 820 split. His body crashed through the windshield. She then drove home and pulled into her garage, leaving Biggs, 37, to die lodged in the car.
Afterward, Mallard burned a car seat to conceal the evidence -- a crime to which she pleaded guilty Monday.
Prosecutors Richard Alpert, Christy Jack and Miles Brissette maintain that Mallard, who was intoxicated on alcohol, Ecstasy and marijuana, committed murder by failing to seek medical care for Biggs.
On Tuesday, they called a Fort Worth Fire Department captain and a John Peter Smith Hospital emergency physician, both of whom testified that Biggs would have survived had he received medical treatment.
Defense attorneys Jeff Kearney and Reagan Wynn have argued in state District Judge James Wilson's court that it was an accident when Mallard hit Biggs and that boyfriend, Jackson was the mastermind behind dumping the body.

Needless to say, I didn't sleep peacefully last night.

I hope everyone has a wonderful day today and the only news we hear is GOOD news!

I don't care?

Mack Ray, writer and diversified farmer in Arkansas, authors "Talegate Time" for Midsouth Farmer Magazine. I have come to look forward to reading his simplified opinions which can and do cover a variety of topics.

This month his article was entitled "Excuse Me for Not Caring" where he's covered many of the items that I've encountered in some of my favorite blogs over the past few weeks.

Mack's take on:

EUROPEANS "I don't care what Europeans think about Americans. We want their business but we really don't much care about what they really think of us. If we did care, we'd probably still be a British colony. They think we are arrogant, crass, materialistic, and obsessed with money. They are pretty much right. We think they are arrogant, lazy, fractious, and disorganized. We are pretty much right. Europeans think 500 miles is a long way, while we think 500 years is a long time."

DIXIE CHICKS "I don't care what the Dixie Chicks think about George Bush and furthermore, I don't care what George Bush thinks about the Dixie Chicks. Even if you like their music, you probably don't look to them for political advice."

HOLLYWOOD CELEBS "I don't care what any celebrities think about politics or current events. Just because you get photographed a lot doesn't mean you are wiser, or deeper, or better informed than anyone else."

REALITY TV "I don't care what happens on these shows which are not even remotely connected to reality. I want to see a show where the top executives of major corporations trade places with their lowest paid employees for a month."

I really like Mack and I appreciate the way he thinks. Do any of us really care a lot about these things? Hell, most days it's all I can do to care about having a place to live, food on the table, and a little something to smile about!!

Today I'm in one of those "down on me" days that I get sometimes. I don't have them real often so I guess I owe it to myself to feel melancholy about how I really feel about things at times. I've listened over and over to this song by Gary Allen. The lyrics speak perfectly about my mood and wants and needs. The midi is the not as beautiful as the actual, but it's all I could find to accompany.

Smoke Rings in the Dark
---Gary Allen

Well I won't make you tell me
What I've come to understand
You're a certain kind of woman and
I'm a different kind of man
I've tried to make you love me
You're tried to find a spark
of the flame that burned and Somehow turned
to smoke ring in the dark

The loneliness within me
Takes a heavy toll
'Cause it burns as slow as whiskey
through an empty aching soul
and The night is like a dagger
Long and cold and sharp
As I sit here on the front steps
Blowing smoke rings in the dark

I- I- I know I must be going
'Cause loves already gone
and All I'm taking with me are the pieces of my heart
and All I'll leave are smoke rings in the dark

The rain falls where it wants to
Wind blows where it will
Everything on earth goes somewhere
But I swear we're standin' still
So I'm not going to wake you
I'll go easy on your heart
I'll just touch your face and drift away
Like smoke rings in the dark

I- I- I know I must be going
'Cause loves already gone and
All I'm taking with me are the pieces of my heart and
All I'll leave are smoke rings in the dark

A neat find from the Tuesday's tired Nanny:

WORRIED HOUSEWIFE

The worried housewife sprang to the telephone when it rang and
listened with relief to the kindly voice in her ear. "How are you,
darling?" it said. "What kind of a day are you having?" "Oh, mother,"
said the housewife, breaking into bitter tears, "I've had such a bad
day. The baby won't eat and the washing machine broke down. I haven't
had a chance to go shopping, and besides, I've just sprained my ankle
and I have to hobble around. On top of that, the house is a mess and
I'm supposed to have two couples to dinner tonight."

The mother was shocked and was at once all sympathy. "Oh, darling,"
she said, "sit down, relax, and close your eyes. I'll be over in
half an hour. I'll do your shopping, clean up the house, and cook
your dinner for you. I'll feed the baby and I'll call a repairman I
know who'll be at your house to fix the washing machine promptly. Now
stop crying. I'll do everything. In fact, I'll even call George at
the office and tell him he ought to come home and help out for once."

"George?" said the housewife. "Who's George?"

"Why, George! Your husband!....Is this 223-1374?

"No, It's 223-1375."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I guess I have the wrong number."

There was a short pause and the housewife said, "Does this mean
you're not coming over?"

Bear sent these the other day. I thought I'd had embarrassing moments but,,,,,,


I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and
asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I
turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband
didn't say a word... he knew better. -Melinda Lowe, 39, Seguin, TX

An insurance man visited me at home to talk about our mortgage
insurance. He was throwing a lot of facts and figures at me, and I
wanted to follow as best I could, so I told my 6-year-old son to run
and get me a pad. He came back and handed me a Kotex right in front of our guest. -Kathy
Newman, 46,
Winston-Salem, NC

I was taking a shower when my 2-year-old son came into the bathroom
and wrapped himself in toilet paper. Although he made a mess, he looked
adorable, so I ran for my camera and took a few shots. They came out
so well that I had copies made and included one with each of our
Christmas cards. Days later, a relative called about the picture, laughing
hysterically, and suggesting I take a closer look. Puzzled, I stared at
the photo and was shocked to discover that in addition to my son, I had
captured my reflection in the mirror - wearing nothing but a camera! - Name
Withheld
(go
figure)

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was
unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for
several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen
who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I
looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."
-Colleen Collins,
31, Ferndale, MI

Nuts about You! My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store
that sold a variety of nuts. As we were looking at the display case,
the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm
just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically,
the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my
sister has never let me forget. -Faye Emerick, 34, Ellerslie, MD

While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amuk. I was finally able to grab hold of
her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I
told her that if she did not start behaving "right now"she would be
punished.To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice just as
threatening,
"If you don't let me go right now, I will tell Grandma that I saw you
kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!"
The silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me were screams of laughter. - Amy Richardson,Stafford, Virginia

A lady picked up several items at a discount store. When she finally
got up to the checker, she learned that one of her items had no price
tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker got on the intercom and
boomed out for all the store to hear, "PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN,
TAMPAX SUPER SIZE ". That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear of the store
apparently misunderstood the word "Tampax" for "THUMBTACKS." In a
business-like tone, a voice boomed back over the intercom. "DO YOU WANT THE KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU POUND IN WITH A HAMMER?" -Diane E. Amov

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My
three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was
on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in
between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While
enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my
seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny
had not asked to go potty in awhile, so I asked him if he needed to go,
and he said "No." I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an
accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?""No," he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an
accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo! I asked one more
time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked
down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled. "SEE MOM,
IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing He calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by
thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very
embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think
beforeshe speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get
any....a true story...We had a female news anchor who, the day after it
was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman and
asked: "So Bob,where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not
only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were
laughing so hard! So glad laughter is good for the soul!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My crazy cousin in Alabama sent this link to my email this morning. Be sure to scroll over each and every pup folks!

My mother worked when we were growing up so my sisters and I were expected to do most of the housework. One morning as she was leaving for work, she told us that the living room had better be spotless when she came home.

We played around all morning but decided it might be in our best interest to get busy and do the cleaning after lunch (those willow switches left a remarkable impression on young minds and their behinds). We dusted and swept the hardwood floor and decided that it needed a little more cleaning so we found ammonia and a wire brush in a cabinet beneath the kitchen sink and got busy scrubbing. When we were finished, you could have eaten a meal off that floor!

I was in my room when mom came in from work. When she screamed I thought something really bad had happened and ran to the living room where I found her sitting on the couch shaking her head and crying. How were we to know that you shouldn't scrub hardwood floors? We'd cleaned it so well that we'd stripped it down to the bare wood.

We escaped the willow switch that day but I think it was only because she was too weak from shock.

Grandpa

I imagine all the things he must have seen, being born as a new century was taking it's first wobbly steps. There were no silver spoons for him to teeth on and probably just a rough, unfinished floor when he learned to crawl. His father owned their spot of land in Oklahoma due to his claim of it during the land rush. He spoke in later years of the unfairness of it, since another older, regal, race of people were sacrificed in it's acquisition.

The motor car was invented when he was a lad but it would be quite some time before he ever saw one. His family farmed with mules and went to town for supplies with a horse and wagon. His mother laundered his 2 shirts and 2 pairs of pants with a rub board, soap she'd made herself, and water from the well. He had one pair of shoes for winter. He ate the bread that was baked in the oven of an old cast iron stove. There was plenty of wood with which to stoke it because there were still plenty of forests back then. Their vegetable garden fed them all summer and the extras were preserved in jars, or by pickling or drying for the cold winter months. They had a cow for milk and pigs to slaughter for hanging in the smoke house. A yard full of chickens and ducks provided them with fresh eggs for at least 9 months of the year and extras were fried up to put on the Sunday dinner table.

Their simple house was built to allow breezes to circulate through doors and windows during the hot months. They gathered in the kitchen in cold weather because the stove in there was the only source of heat other than the drafty old fireplace.

Baths weren't an every day event, but at least twice a week they filled the old tin wash tub with water that had been heated on the wood stove. During warm months, with a bar of soap and a dip in the creek, they made do.

As soon as he was old enough, he had chores to do and he did them without question. His family worked side by side in order to eat and live. He said he had a good life and felt lucky because there were others who had much less.

He was 65 year old before he owned a television and only turned it on for the evening news. He bought an air conditioner for the spare bedroom (for company) in 1995, he didn't like the unnatural coldness from it himself. Mostly self-educated because at 13 his father died and left him the head of the family, he ran a sawmill, scouted timber, and farmed without even the aid of a calculator.

He and my grandmother raised 8 children to be fine adults and he outlived 3 of them. He also outlived my grandmother by 10 years and on the day of her funeral was the first time I ever saw him cry. He stayed strong for her until then.

I know all of these things and more because he told me while I sat many times with him in that old swing beneath the pecan tree in his yard.

I have such fun when I find new blogs to read that make me smile. Thank you for commenting Dave. Leslie and Katrina are much better at finding these goodies than I am but I'm sure glad they share them with the rest of us.

Last evening I watched a movie after everyone else went to bed. (yes another one!). Sometimes it's fun to watch for no other reason other than it's corny enough to be hilarious.

American Pie II is a really funny, if slightly raunchy, movie about a bunch of guys who are having a final summer of fun before college and responsibilities begin. I can't even begin to describe one of the scenes which included a tuba, and the "pretend" lesbians broadcasted over the CB waves made me wipe tears. My favorite scene was about Jimbo.

After mistaking a tube of super glue for lubricant, Jim ends up in the ER with a porn tape "stuck" to one hand and his penis "stuck" in the other. The next morning his friend greeted him at breakfast with, "Jim, you are the only guy I know who's' dick should come with an instruction manual".

A perfect contribution from Bear today.

IN THE BEGINNING

In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach,green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's and Krispy Kreme Donuts.

And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said "Yea," and woman said, "And another one with sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt that woman might keep the figure that man found so fair.

And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane, and combined them. And woman went from size 2 to size 6.

So God said, "Try my fresh green salad."

And Satan presented Thousand-Island Dressing and garlic toast on the side. And man and woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them."

And Satan brought forth deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.

God then brought running shoes so that his children might lose those extra pounds.

And Satan gave cable TV with a remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And man and woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and gained pounds.

God then gave lean beef so that man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite.

And Satan created McDonald's and it's 99-cent double
cheeseburger. Then said, "You want fries with that?" And man replied, "Yea! And super size 'em." And Satan said "It is good." And man went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

And Satan created HMOs

I normally only give gold stars to those who catch on to the wiseassedness in me, BUT....I think the graphics that Leslie shares with us in her blog deserves some recognition. Don't ya'll agree?
So Miss Leslie, here is your star,,,,,

Well, another Friday on it's way to biting the dust. But it wasn't too bad a day. I was awake early and weaved my way through the toys after crashing in Zach's bed last night (that damned snoring again in my bed). I dropped Zach off at his "real" home and went into work until about 11. Then I ran some errands, picked him up, and came home to do a few chores. Late this afternoon we went for a little ride on the 4wheeler so I could get some practice in driving it. (forgot to mention my short, little nap in there somewhere).

I hope everyone had a Happy Friday!!

Boy blogger is really putting me in a pissy mood today! However, here is another contribution from Timm that made me smile. A discussion between a redneck father and son,,,,,,,,,,

"What did you learn in algebra class today, son?"

"Well, I learned Pi R Squared," replied the boy.

"Now, hold on there son," he quickly replied, "you may think I am
stupid, but everybody knows that pies are round."

And a little advice for the day:

No matter how many times you've had it, if it's offered take it,
because it may never come around again.

Tball is over!! They tied tonight's game so the end result was first place for their little team. This Nanny is glad all that's past for another year. Now we just have to get through dental appointments and kick back for the rest of the summer.

Timm's been at it again! He sure makes it hard to be in a bad mood :-)

Ways to Seduce Your Spouse After Fifty Years of Marriage

Secretly replace his Centrum Silver with Viagra.

Light a few candles and put on some romantic music - then dress up
like "Matlock."

Walk around the house in a T-shirt, black socks and no underpants.
Hey, it worked for my old man.

Sensuous Aspercreme rubdowns.

Shout lewd suggestions into her hearing aid.

Crank up the oxygen tent to "high" and hope you get lucky.

Give her a sensual foot massage, and while you're down there, go
ahead and rub her breasts as well.

Tiger-striped Depends, baby!

My mind has spent a lot of time on Leslie's blog entry on Tuesday. And my thoughts on why our older citizens are being treated in such a cruel and senseless manner has to do with the power that we've given our governments and medical organizations in making decisions about our lives. I think we are allowing an outbreak of utilitarian bioethics to breed that will never go away unless we find a way to put a halt to it.

Utilitarians believe that every life should be assigned a value to society and that medical care should be rationed according to that assigned value. This philosophy supports the killing, by neglect, of the physically handicapped, Down Syndrome children, people over sixty with medical problems requiring expensive treatment like dialysis, and bypass surgery, and others. It's happening people.

A few months ago, I watched "John Q". This movie is based on a real life incident involving a man, a father, taking on the medical/insurance system when his child required a heart transplant that the insurance company refused to cover. I was sad, I was enraged, but I was also certain that this sort of thing happens every day.

I believe the bottom line, and if it's profitable, is all that matters in the majority of the incidents involving our seniors or our medically needy citizens. Government and big corporations should not have the power to make the decisions involving our lives.

Ok ya'll. Tell me what you think of my new doins here. I've been pondering on this stuff all day and finally got it sort of where I wanted it to go. The music does stop eventually in case you get sick of it, but I kind of like that song myself

Ah HA!! Got it!! At least for now. So now ya'll can click the weather text and see what it's doing down here, or the scrapbooking and Helena Daily World links to see fun stuff to do and local unworthy news headlines. Click on the Garfield Cartoon and head to his website for a smile. I'm getting there slowly but surely (turning cartwheels here).

I am still working on my weather clip. Darn thing isn't wanting to cooperate at-tal.

Alexis (the little southern chickie) has been chewing and drooling on everything over the past few weeks. Yesterday she finally presented us with the PRIZES, two sweet little teeth on the bottom itchy gums! Now before you say, "Geez, this broad needs to get a life", I want you to think about how it would be not to have teeth. There's no doubt about it, Liquid Diets suck! Think of how it would be if you couldn't eat an M&M, or a pork chop, or god forbid, a SKITTLE! Your smile would be empty and hollow. Your face would look all droopy without teeth to support your jaw muscles.

So ya'll be kind and celebrate this great event with me. I'll be going soon to buy her first bag of pork skins so we can happily munch together!

I reckon we really shouldn't worry too much about Martha Stewart and her antics. This lady is used to making something from nothing and that talent has served her well over the years. If she should happen to actually spend time behind bars we can look ahead to a new era in prison decor!

Jail birds everywhere will be trading items not attached to concrete to snatch up a copy.

Even entertaining fellow inmates will be a breeze.

And for those more used to the Ritz, well,,,here you go!

Ahhh Ha,,Many, Many thank you's to Carl, (the computer guru that Leslie lets sleep on her side of the bed). I'm going to learn something yet if I don't watch out.

I bought a new gadget today, and early birthday present for me, ME, MEEE!! I had permission from "the man" to go ahead and get it since he doesn't know which end of most of these gadgets has the viewfinder or power button! Anyway, this evening I will be installing the editing software on my computer for the new SONY Digital Handycam. It has 700X Digital Zoom, and 20X optical. Takes stills, has a remote. My fingers are itching to dive into the manual so I'll know how to turn the damn thing on and find out what all of the aforementioned means! Ya'll wish me luck!

I sure would appreciate someone looking at my source so they could tell me how to center the table goodies I inserted on my page. I'm thinking reallly slow here :-)

I'm up, and I'm almost awake, but I'm moving slow. Yesterday was a pretty full day even though it rained off and on all day. Today looks to be more of the same weather- wise. This southern belle can only take so much of this togetherness and at this point my glass is almost full!

We had a pretty good father's day here in the south today. It rained on our BBQ but the food was still good.