You might be a farmer if...
Your dog rides in your truck more than your wife does.
You wave at every vehicle whether you know them or not.
You always look when a vehicle passes your house, even after dark.
You have convinced your wife that an overnight, out-of-state trip after equipment parts is a vacation.
You have specific hats worn to: farm sales, livestock auctions, customer appreciation suppers and vacation.
You have ever had to wash off in the back yard with a garden hose before your wife would let you in the house.
You have never willingly thrown away an empty 5-gallon bucket.
You have used bailing wire to attach a license plate to a vehicle.
You have used a chain saw to remodel your house.
You can remember the fertilizer rate, seeding rate, herbicide rate, and final yields on a farm you rented 10 years ago, but cannot recall your wife's birthday to dress size.
You have fibbed to a mechanic about how often you greased a piece of equipment.
You have used a velvet leaf plant as toilet paper.
You have driven off the road while examining your neighbors' crops.
You have "borrowed" gravel from the county road to fill potholes in your driveway.
You have buried a dog and cried like a baby.
You have used a tractor front-end loader as scaffolding for roof repairs.
You have used your castrating knife to slice and eat apples just to make your wife queasy.
And finally, if given $1,000,000 you would keep right on farming. You'd farm differently, but you'd keep on farming because that is who and what you are.
Hubby is guilty of everything in bold type!!