Tuesday, September 30, 2003
Music
While reading Ms. Leslie's blog this morning I was reminded how long it's been since I've been to a concert. A long time!
I think the last one was the Morris Day and the Time concert over at the Isle of Capris across the river here. I was one of a minority group of southerners who really enjoys the preening, flashy show they put on.
I've also enjoyed other concerts at that casino but two other favorites were
who can sing your blues away, and
who make you want to sing along.
I think the last one was the Morris Day and the Time concert over at the Isle of Capris across the river here. I was one of a minority group of southerners who really enjoys the preening, flashy show they put on.
I've also enjoyed other concerts at that casino but two other favorites were
who can sing your blues away, and
who make you want to sing along.
On New Vocabulary Skills
On Sunday evening, Zach and I had a deep but short conversation. "Nanny, do I have to go to school tomorrow? They won't care if I miss a day sometimes." I waded in with my pitch about how he didn't need to miss school unless he was sick because he had so much to learn, and how would he ever be able to read big books with big words if he didn't learn. His reply was, "Nanny, I can read those big words if you just give me a minute, I can break them down in chunks and read them.
Early Morning Tuesday
We found out last evening that they're pretty sure Vicki died from a heart attack. That news is pretty much like a bucket of cold water tossed in the family's face. She did absolutely everything for them and now they're on their own.
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Monday, September 29, 2003
Awwww Man, My Favorite Place
Built at a cost of millions of manufacturing jobs and an untold number of small local businesses, there is nary a point in God's America that isn't within screaming distance of the Great Wal-Mart of Made in China. Though it continues to spread across the landscape like some unstoppable disease-fungus hybrid out of your grandparents' worst nightmares, the Great Wal-Mart of Made in China is already the only retail outlet visible from outer space. Economic experts have predicted that by the year 2015, fully three-quarters of the nation's redneck workforce will be employed by the Great Wal-Mart of Made in China.
from Monday's edition of the Daily Dirt
from Monday's edition of the Daily Dirt
Something Good,,,Something Sad.
It has been a really strange day.
Around 11 my phone rang and it was Soony, my dutch child, calling me from Holland.
She just wanted to talk and we did for a good, long while. I had been thinking of her for the past few weeks and had sent an email this morning to ask if all was ok with her and her family. I supposed our thoughts of each other finally met and she called to say she still loved me.
After we said our goodbyes, I called James on his cell to tell him that she'd called and he told me that he'd been trying to call me to tell me that another friend had died this morning. Vicki was a year or two younger than me and her husband also works for the same farming corporation as an asst. manager.
He said it was really odd, she went to work, walked into the office and passed out. They called an ambulance and when they arrived she was dead. The cause of death is not known yet but it's really eerie because she hasn't even been ill.
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Around 11 my phone rang and it was Soony, my dutch child, calling me from Holland.
She just wanted to talk and we did for a good, long while. I had been thinking of her for the past few weeks and had sent an email this morning to ask if all was ok with her and her family. I supposed our thoughts of each other finally met and she called to say she still loved me.
After we said our goodbyes, I called James on his cell to tell him that she'd called and he told me that he'd been trying to call me to tell me that another friend had died this morning. Vicki was a year or two younger than me and her husband also works for the same farming corporation as an asst. manager.
He said it was really odd, she went to work, walked into the office and passed out. They called an ambulance and when they arrived she was dead. The cause of death is not known yet but it's really eerie because she hasn't even been ill.
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What do You think?
Let me know what you think of my new fall colors. I'd appreciate it if anyone could tell me how I could place graphics across from my blog title on top of the page. I've tried a lot of different things and had to undo them all. I'm too dense to do it I reckon.
ROFLMAO!
The following is taken from a Florida newspaper:
A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio
and his wife was in the house, in the kitchen.
The man was racing the engine on the motorcycle
and somehow, the motorcycle slipped into gear.
The man, still holding the handlebars, was dragged through a glass
patio door and the motorcycle dumped onto the floor inside the house.
The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room, and found
her husband laying on the floor, cut and bleeding, the motorcycle
laying next to him and the patio door shattered. The wife ran to
the phone and summoned an ambulance. Because they lived on a fairly
large hill, the wife went down the several flights of long steps to
the street to direct the paramedics to her husband.
After the ambulance arrived and transported the husband to the
hospital, the wife uprighted the motorcycle and pushed it outside.
Seeing that gas had spilled on the floor, the wife obtained some
papers towels, blotted up the gasoline, and threw the towels in the toilet.
The husband was treated at the hospital and was released to come
home. After arriving home, he looked at the shattered patio door and
the damage done to his motorcycle. He became despondent, went into the
bathroom, sat on the toilet and smoked a cigarette. After finishing
the cigarette, he flipped it between his legs into the toilet bowl while still seated.
The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her
husband screaming. She ran into the bathroom and found her husband
laying on the floor. His trousers had been blown away and he was suffering
burns on the buttocks, the back of his legs and his groin. The wife again
ran to the phone and called for an ambulance.
The same ambulance crew was dispatched and the wife met them at
the street. The paramedics loaded the husband on the stretcher and
began carrying him to the street. While they were going down the stairs
to the street accompanied by the wife, one of the paramedics asked
the wife how the husband had burned himself. She told them and the
paramedics started laughing so hard, one of them tipped the stretcher and
dumped the husband out. He fell down the remaining steps and broke his ankle.
**************************************************
A man was working on his motorcycle on his patio
and his wife was in the house, in the kitchen.
The man was racing the engine on the motorcycle
and somehow, the motorcycle slipped into gear.
The man, still holding the handlebars, was dragged through a glass
patio door and the motorcycle dumped onto the floor inside the house.
The wife, hearing the crash, ran into the dining room, and found
her husband laying on the floor, cut and bleeding, the motorcycle
laying next to him and the patio door shattered. The wife ran to
the phone and summoned an ambulance. Because they lived on a fairly
large hill, the wife went down the several flights of long steps to
the street to direct the paramedics to her husband.
After the ambulance arrived and transported the husband to the
hospital, the wife uprighted the motorcycle and pushed it outside.
Seeing that gas had spilled on the floor, the wife obtained some
papers towels, blotted up the gasoline, and threw the towels in the toilet.
The husband was treated at the hospital and was released to come
home. After arriving home, he looked at the shattered patio door and
the damage done to his motorcycle. He became despondent, went into the
bathroom, sat on the toilet and smoked a cigarette. After finishing
the cigarette, he flipped it between his legs into the toilet bowl while still seated.
The wife, who was in the kitchen, heard a loud explosion and her
husband screaming. She ran into the bathroom and found her husband
laying on the floor. His trousers had been blown away and he was suffering
burns on the buttocks, the back of his legs and his groin. The wife again
ran to the phone and called for an ambulance.
The same ambulance crew was dispatched and the wife met them at
the street. The paramedics loaded the husband on the stretcher and
began carrying him to the street. While they were going down the stairs
to the street accompanied by the wife, one of the paramedics asked
the wife how the husband had burned himself. She told them and the
paramedics started laughing so hard, one of them tipped the stretcher and
dumped the husband out. He fell down the remaining steps and broke his ankle.
**************************************************
Unconscious Mutterings
Herpes:: ouch?
Freddy:: Fender
October:: trick or treat
Hunting:: dog
MSN:: program
36:: what I was
Hotel:: Relaxation
Travesty:: of freedom
Health:: not smoking
Conditions::calm and cool
borrowed from Chaos
Freddy:: Fender
October:: trick or treat
Hunting:: dog
MSN:: program
36:: what I was
Hotel:: Relaxation
Travesty:: of freedom
Health:: not smoking
Conditions::calm and cool
borrowed from Chaos
Sunday, September 28, 2003
HOLY SHIT!!
That's it, I'm freaking out now.
I found a thumbnail photo of a homeless guy to place on my entry from earlier this morning about the man asking me for money for food yesterday. When I logged on just now, that photo had changed to something different called Dirty Whore Diary.
That was just too freaky for words, and mind you, it takes a lot to put me at a loss for words!!
I found a thumbnail photo of a homeless guy to place on my entry from earlier this morning about the man asking me for money for food yesterday. When I logged on just now, that photo had changed to something different called Dirty Whore Diary.
That was just too freaky for words, and mind you, it takes a lot to put me at a loss for words!!
What's Funny About Aging
Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids? If you're less than 10 years old, you're so excited about aging that you think in fractions. How old are you? .... "I'm four and a half" .... You're never 36 and a half .... you're four and a half going on five!
That's the key. You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number. How old are you? "I'm gonna be 16." You could be 12, but you're gonna be 16.
And then the greatest day of your life happens .... you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony .... you BECOME 21 ... YES!!!
But then you turn 30 .... ooohhh what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk .... He TURNED, we had to throw him out. There's no fun now. What's wrong?? What changed?? You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40 ..... stay over there, it's all slipping away ........
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, you're PUSHING 40, you REACH 50 ..... and your dreams are gone.
Then you MAKE IT to 60 ..... you didn't think you'd make it!!!!
So you BECOME 21, you TURN 30, you're PUSHING 40, you REACH 50, you MAKE IT to 60 ...... then you build up so much speed you HIT 70!
After that, it's a day by day thing. After that, you HIT Wednesday .... You get into your 80's, you HIT lunch. You TURN 4:30, my grandmother wouldn't even buy green bananas .... it's an investment you know, and maybe a bad one.
And it doesn't end there .... into the 90's you start going backwards .... I was JUST 92 ... Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again .... "I'm 100 and a half!!!!"
That's the key. You get into your teens, now they can't hold you back. You jump to the next number. How old are you? "I'm gonna be 16." You could be 12, but you're gonna be 16.
And then the greatest day of your life happens .... you become 21. Even the words sound like a ceremony .... you BECOME 21 ... YES!!!
But then you turn 30 .... ooohhh what happened there? Makes you sound like bad milk .... He TURNED, we had to throw him out. There's no fun now. What's wrong?? What changed?? You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, then you're PUSHING 40 ..... stay over there, it's all slipping away ........
You BECOME 21, you TURN 30, you're PUSHING 40, you REACH 50 ..... and your dreams are gone.
Then you MAKE IT to 60 ..... you didn't think you'd make it!!!!
So you BECOME 21, you TURN 30, you're PUSHING 40, you REACH 50, you MAKE IT to 60 ...... then you build up so much speed you HIT 70!
After that, it's a day by day thing. After that, you HIT Wednesday .... You get into your 80's, you HIT lunch. You TURN 4:30, my grandmother wouldn't even buy green bananas .... it's an investment you know, and maybe a bad one.
And it doesn't end there .... into the 90's you start going backwards .... I was JUST 92 ... Then a strange thing happens. If you make it over 100, you become a little kid again .... "I'm 100 and a half!!!!"
More on Saturday
While I was in Little Rock yesterday, I made a quick trip to one of the shopping centers there and found two new books to read and a few scrapbooking supplies. As I was going to my truck in the parking lot a man carrying a backpack walked up to me and told me that he and his wife were hitchhiking to S.C. and they were out of money and hungry.
When I got back to my daughter's, I was telling she and my son about this man and they wanted to know how much I'd given him for his drug or drinking habit. They know I can't stand the thought of someone being hungry. I listened to them fuss at me about giving money to strangers, and then I asked them,
"What if that had been Jesus?"
Although I hate the thought of contributing to a drug or alcohol addiction, I was not in a position to buy the man a meal or give him food, and that thought is always in the back of your mind, what if he really IS hungry.
I listened to the arguments about the social programs and stuff available, but don't you have to have a permanent address for things such as food stamps or checks? What happens if you don't have a home and don't know where to go for help?
This is America. People should not have to be hungry or cold, but they are. It's a sad situation. What would you do?
When I got back to my daughter's, I was telling she and my son about this man and they wanted to know how much I'd given him for his drug or drinking habit. They know I can't stand the thought of someone being hungry. I listened to them fuss at me about giving money to strangers, and then I asked them,
"What if that had been Jesus?"
Although I hate the thought of contributing to a drug or alcohol addiction, I was not in a position to buy the man a meal or give him food, and that thought is always in the back of your mind, what if he really IS hungry.
I listened to the arguments about the social programs and stuff available, but don't you have to have a permanent address for things such as food stamps or checks? What happens if you don't have a home and don't know where to go for help?
This is America. People should not have to be hungry or cold, but they are. It's a sad situation. What would you do?
Saturday, September 27, 2003
Home Again
The birthday party turned out really well. My daughter decided to have it at Burns Park in Little Rock and it was much cooler today than it has been so a good time was had by all. Now,,on to the photos.
Another Long Day
Driving to Little Rock again today for Jaylen's birthday party. She's 2 today!! I'll be home with new photos later.
Friday, September 26, 2003
In Them Old Cotton Fields Back Home,,,,,,,,,
The title is one of those old country songs from way back when. Cotton pickin is upon us here in Arkansas. The air is fragrant with defoliants (which I hate) and fluffy bolls of cotton (which I love). While the weather stays nice and dry, I can look forward to hubby being in the field until after dark most days. I'll be spending some of my time on the weekends out in the fields with Zach cause that child sure loves to help them at harvest time.
I walked out the front door and took a couple of photos of the field to the south of our house.
I walked out the front door and took a couple of photos of the field to the south of our house.
A New Study
A study in London showed that the kind of "male face" a woman finds attractive can differ depending on where a woman is in her menstrual cycle.
For instance, if she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged, masculine features, and if she is menstruating, she is more prone to be attracted to a man with a heavy pair of scissors shoved in his forehead.
For instance, if she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged, masculine features, and if she is menstruating, she is more prone to be attracted to a man with a heavy pair of scissors shoved in his forehead.
Thursday, September 25, 2003
A Day In The Life
I got through another one and it wasn't so bad.
I finally got my old butt moving and made it to work before 9 and worked for a few hours until came up against another one of those brick walls. After I left the office I drove over to Helena to sign some forms to be faxed to the doctor that I saw on Tuesday, then I stopped at the grocery and picked up a few things.
I made it home around 12:30 and spent the next 2 hours on the phone with the IRS coniving and bargaining over Willie's (one of the farm tractor drivers) tax debt. I finally made progress when after the agent asked me why this man shouldn't be held responsible for the way his tax returns were filed, I told her the man can barely read or write and whichever whore he was living with at any given time took care of filing his returns for him and that was the WHOLE problem! I then calmly told her that it would be to her advantage AND his if she'd see about deferring some of the penalties and release the lien against his pay check so that he could afford to buy gas to drive to work.
I think this must have gotten her attention somewhat because he now will be allowed to make a monthly payment of about 1/10 of what they were taking with the lien and hubby will keep a good tractor driver. ( I doubt he'll get the debt paid off before he dies of old age though.)
Then, on my way to pick the terrorist up from school, I was on the cell phone with Altell about my son's cell package which is part of our fleet account. They've had it screwed up since last March and I'm hoping they have that straight THIS time.
I am very proud to say that I didn't lose my cool completely during the above mentioned telephone encounters, which is a rare thing for me since I tend to get very frustrated, then very upset, when I have to keep repeating myself over and over about something.
Patience is not one of my virtues. (and Kat, don't ask what one of my virtues MIGHT be!)
I think I'll go read a little in a bit and see how much sleep I can get tonight. I woke up this morning with an itchy hand that is still driving me bonkers!
Hugs and kisses all around. Nite!
I finally got my old butt moving and made it to work before 9 and worked for a few hours until came up against another one of those brick walls. After I left the office I drove over to Helena to sign some forms to be faxed to the doctor that I saw on Tuesday, then I stopped at the grocery and picked up a few things.
I made it home around 12:30 and spent the next 2 hours on the phone with the IRS coniving and bargaining over Willie's (one of the farm tractor drivers) tax debt. I finally made progress when after the agent asked me why this man shouldn't be held responsible for the way his tax returns were filed, I told her the man can barely read or write and whichever whore he was living with at any given time took care of filing his returns for him and that was the WHOLE problem! I then calmly told her that it would be to her advantage AND his if she'd see about deferring some of the penalties and release the lien against his pay check so that he could afford to buy gas to drive to work.
I think this must have gotten her attention somewhat because he now will be allowed to make a monthly payment of about 1/10 of what they were taking with the lien and hubby will keep a good tractor driver. ( I doubt he'll get the debt paid off before he dies of old age though.)
Then, on my way to pick the terrorist up from school, I was on the cell phone with Altell about my son's cell package which is part of our fleet account. They've had it screwed up since last March and I'm hoping they have that straight THIS time.
I am very proud to say that I didn't lose my cool completely during the above mentioned telephone encounters, which is a rare thing for me since I tend to get very frustrated, then very upset, when I have to keep repeating myself over and over about something.
Patience is not one of my virtues. (and Kat, don't ask what one of my virtues MIGHT be!)
I think I'll go read a little in a bit and see how much sleep I can get tonight. I woke up this morning with an itchy hand that is still driving me bonkers!
Hugs and kisses all around. Nite!
Morning Comes Early
I'm up and Zach is up and dressed and watching cartoons while he waits for his ride to school. Before I got to this stage though, I noticed the sun was trying to peek over to the east and a little wisp of fog was trying to rise so I ran for the camera. I wish it I could make it look as beautiful as it was.
This little critter was resting by the back door.
This little critter was resting by the back door.
Wednesday, September 24, 2003
These Dang Comments Thingys
These comments are on again and off again more often than Johns in a cat house down on Yazoo street!!
TOUGH LOVE
There is just so much good stuff coming my way today that I'm wiggling in my chair with eagerness to share! I love this woman, she's got it going ON. I wanna grow up to be just like her!
Dear Abby,
I recently read your column advising grandparents on "tough love" for
grandparents to give misbehaving grandchildren, whose own parents let
them run wild. I have followed your advice, and enclose a picture
demonstrating my technique when my grandson just won't behave while
I'm babysitting for his parents. They have told me not to spank him, so
I just take him for a ride, and he usually calms down afterward.
Sign me,
Tough Love Grandma
Dear Abby,
I recently read your column advising grandparents on "tough love" for
grandparents to give misbehaving grandchildren, whose own parents let
them run wild. I have followed your advice, and enclose a picture
demonstrating my technique when my grandson just won't behave while
I'm babysitting for his parents. They have told me not to spank him, so
I just take him for a ride, and he usually calms down afterward.
Sign me,
Tough Love Grandma
ASTROLOGICAL PROVERBS
Aries
Leave it for tomorrow, what you could do today. ARIES did it yesterday.
Taurus
First food, then fun.
Gemini
Speech fast, silence miserable.
Cancer
Live with a CANCER and find out soon: You live under the moods of her Moon.
Leo
Let's lift the cat on the table, LEO will climb for himself.
Virgo
Only a Virgo sees trees even in the forest.
Libra
Biggest fight will be little, when a LIBRA walks in the middle.
Scorpio
In war and in love all the means are allowed for a Scorpio.
Sagittarius
Laughter after joy, although the trees in the forest were missed.
Capricorn
No Capricorn grows without discipline, or dies without honor.
Aquarius
Today is already yesterday's tomorrow.
Pisces
Who else will land a fish, than a fish?
Leave it for tomorrow, what you could do today. ARIES did it yesterday.
Taurus
First food, then fun.
Gemini
Speech fast, silence miserable.
Cancer
Live with a CANCER and find out soon: You live under the moods of her Moon.
Leo
Let's lift the cat on the table, LEO will climb for himself.
Virgo
Only a Virgo sees trees even in the forest.
Libra
Biggest fight will be little, when a LIBRA walks in the middle.
Scorpio
In war and in love all the means are allowed for a Scorpio.
Sagittarius
Laughter after joy, although the trees in the forest were missed.
Capricorn
No Capricorn grows without discipline, or dies without honor.
Aquarius
Today is already yesterday's tomorrow.
Pisces
Who else will land a fish, than a fish?
The Aging Factor
There's been a lot in the news lately about the scientific community's research on aging. If they can identify the factors that make people age, scientists say it will make a big step toward longer lives for all of us.
At the risk of putting a lot of scientists out of work, there's really no big mystery. Having kids causes old age. I don't have a lot of studies, charts, and analytical data to support that. All I do is offer myself as "Exhibit A".
Once upon a time I was a young lady. I had a figure, and my joints did not protest with movement. Then my first child was born and I became an old woman.
My back went first.
This came from from loading 700 pounds of baby equipment into the trunk of the car every time we took a trip that lasted longer than half an hour. After 8,000 miles of horsey-back rides across the kitchen floor, I had blisters on my palms, calluses on my knees and sway in my spine.
Those weren't really age spots on my hands and forearms. They were Sani-Flush stains from reaching into toilets to rescue combs, Lincoln Logs, and Fisher-Price people. After a while I got used to walking around with one sleeve permanently rolled up, but I'm still trying to get over the effects of having to give mouth-to-mouth to a Baby Tears.
The more kids I had, the older I got. All my life I had 20/20 vision. But by the time I had assisted on the first few hundred book reports that didn't get started until the night before they were due because "nobody told me about it," I was making weekly visits to an optometrist.
My only consolation is that now these children have children of their own.
Now, they're older than I am!
At the risk of putting a lot of scientists out of work, there's really no big mystery. Having kids causes old age. I don't have a lot of studies, charts, and analytical data to support that. All I do is offer myself as "Exhibit A".
Once upon a time I was a young lady. I had a figure, and my joints did not protest with movement. Then my first child was born and I became an old woman.
My back went first.
This came from from loading 700 pounds of baby equipment into the trunk of the car every time we took a trip that lasted longer than half an hour. After 8,000 miles of horsey-back rides across the kitchen floor, I had blisters on my palms, calluses on my knees and sway in my spine.
Those weren't really age spots on my hands and forearms. They were Sani-Flush stains from reaching into toilets to rescue combs, Lincoln Logs, and Fisher-Price people. After a while I got used to walking around with one sleeve permanently rolled up, but I'm still trying to get over the effects of having to give mouth-to-mouth to a Baby Tears.
The more kids I had, the older I got. All my life I had 20/20 vision. But by the time I had assisted on the first few hundred book reports that didn't get started until the night before they were due because "nobody told me about it," I was making weekly visits to an optometrist.
My only consolation is that now these children have children of their own.
Now, they're older than I am!
My Funny Son
Jerri, Bubbie and the Chickie entertained us last night at the supper table. Bubbie starts his new position at the prison as a field officer on Monday. They decided not to give him the horse that goes to sleep on the job sometimes so he'll be riding a more alert horse at least. I had to laugh when he told us that for a few weeks, while in training, he'll be carrying a wooden gun.
So now he'll have to chase em down and hit them with a piece of wood? Or perhaps point it and say "bang, bang"?? I wish I could be a little bird ya know.
So now he'll have to chase em down and hit them with a piece of wood? Or perhaps point it and say "bang, bang"?? I wish I could be a little bird ya know.
Good Morning!
I popped over to see Mary lou in my wanderings this morning. That pup of hers has a taste for socks and undies. It reminded me of my friends who once had a dog that used to eat their clothes every time they left without taking her. She'd jump up, snag a pair of jeans from the closet and eat the ass outta them, or dig through the laundry basket and bite holes in their underwear.
You gotta admit, that was a smart dog!
Tuesday, September 23, 2003
Weary
The girls came by this morning to visit with Nanny and the Chickie came this evening for supper so it's been a full day. I think it's time to curl up with my book and see if the sand man will come to visit soon. I'll pick Zach up from school tomorrow so things will be hectic again for the rest of the week.
Nite, nite!!
Nite, nite!!
Death and Humor
I've just been over to Wanda's where I read her entry about John Ritter and the plans to continue the sitcom he'd been starring in at the time of his death. There are conflicting emotions from his fans about these plans but I think Wanda pretty much summed it up when she said he'd want things to go on. There is nothing funny about death, but I think you must keep your sense of humor during even the most trying times to prevent the sadness from taking over your life.
When my mother died a few years ago we were all gathered at the funeral home for the viewing. Tears were shed, friends came and went, and there in the midst of all of that was my mother looking better in death than she had in the last 10 years of her life. We were all sitting on sofas talking quietly when suddenly my aunt jumped up and said, "OH, don't do that, get away from there!" My niece and nephew and Zach, had crawled beneath the coffin and were happily playing. I just looked up at my aunt and told her to leave them, they weren't bothering anything, and told her to sit down and relax. I had to smile about it, they continued on with what kids do best even amid the room full of weepy grownups. And I don't think my mother minded one little bit!!
When my mother died a few years ago we were all gathered at the funeral home for the viewing. Tears were shed, friends came and went, and there in the midst of all of that was my mother looking better in death than she had in the last 10 years of her life. We were all sitting on sofas talking quietly when suddenly my aunt jumped up and said, "OH, don't do that, get away from there!" My niece and nephew and Zach, had crawled beneath the coffin and were happily playing. I just looked up at my aunt and told her to leave them, they weren't bothering anything, and told her to sit down and relax. I had to smile about it, they continued on with what kids do best even amid the room full of weepy grownups. And I don't think my mother minded one little bit!!
Today is the first day of Autumn.
That means I've got to start trimming back and pruning soon. Sounds like work don't it?
Monday, September 22, 2003
Monday's Mumbles
Match.com personals. Fun-loving gal, 42, likes long walks on the beach, long Sunday afternoons at Linens 'n' Things, bridge . . . PLEASE KILL ME
Livejournal. How I'm feeling: bored.
Song stuck in my head: "Raspberry Beret."
Air of mystery that once surrounded me: gone.
Drinks with "sexy" names. Bar patrons who order a "screaming orgasm," "sex on the beach," "blow job," or "long slow screw against the wall" are
77% less likely to get laid than the ones drinking beer. Wonder why?
Pilates. Yoga minus the kinky contortions. There are better ways to spend an hour on your back.
Valium. It gained fame as the drug that kept Donna Reed fem-bots from having nervous breakdowns and burning the roast. Except you're not cute
like Donna Reed. You're just slurring your speech. Stop it.
Over-grooming. Being clean and neat is good. People appreciate a white smile and trimmed fingernails. If you're spending time and money getting
your asshole bleached, step back for a sec. (don't groan, I read an article about this!!)
Continentals. Everything sounds sexy with an outrageous accent. Sure, whatever they say seems profound, but that's because their 300-word
vocabulary was gleaned entirely from Doors records. Context, people!
All-over tans. Frequently accompanied by a clean-shaved pubic region, a pot belly and a NASCAR visor. A deep-tanned penis looks like a dry-cured
meat snack you bought at a gas station. Tan lines = hot!
The Mile High Club. You hear a lot about horny, uncreative couples ducking into airplane restrooms together. What you don't hear about are
sprained knees, the smell of disinfectant, and the very real possibility of
being sucked through the toilet to your death.
Livejournal. How I'm feeling: bored.
Song stuck in my head: "Raspberry Beret."
Air of mystery that once surrounded me: gone.
Drinks with "sexy" names. Bar patrons who order a "screaming orgasm," "sex on the beach," "blow job," or "long slow screw against the wall" are
77% less likely to get laid than the ones drinking beer. Wonder why?
Pilates. Yoga minus the kinky contortions. There are better ways to spend an hour on your back.
Valium. It gained fame as the drug that kept Donna Reed fem-bots from having nervous breakdowns and burning the roast. Except you're not cute
like Donna Reed. You're just slurring your speech. Stop it.
Over-grooming. Being clean and neat is good. People appreciate a white smile and trimmed fingernails. If you're spending time and money getting
your asshole bleached, step back for a sec. (don't groan, I read an article about this!!)
Continentals. Everything sounds sexy with an outrageous accent. Sure, whatever they say seems profound, but that's because their 300-word
vocabulary was gleaned entirely from Doors records. Context, people!
All-over tans. Frequently accompanied by a clean-shaved pubic region, a pot belly and a NASCAR visor. A deep-tanned penis looks like a dry-cured
meat snack you bought at a gas station. Tan lines = hot!
The Mile High Club. You hear a lot about horny, uncreative couples ducking into airplane restrooms together. What you don't hear about are
sprained knees, the smell of disinfectant, and the very real possibility of
being sucked through the toilet to your death.
I'm Back
It rained all day yesterday and last night so hubby woke up this morning with the bright idea to go to my doctor's appointment with me. Wonderful news.
My appointment was a 2:45, at 4, I was finally called in to see the doctor. Her first concern was my blood pressure but she became less concerned when I told her that I'd been waiting in her crowded waiting room for an hour and a half AFTER having ridden with my husband for the past two hours and had she been me, her blood pressure would be right up there also. Thirty minutes after my first glimpse of the woman, and two punctures later, I was on my way out of the building with a "snoopy" bandaid and a bruised arm. About the only thing I really understood that the woman said was,
1. I am not diabetic, my blood sugar is fine.
2. My body is retaining too much fluid (duh,)
3. My thyroid is suspect? (of what I was not able to decypher)
4. They'll call me with the test results and further instructions.
I have felt all along that I suffer from "deadass disease" for which there is no cure other than a brain transplant which is not covered by my HMO.
My appointment was a 2:45, at 4, I was finally called in to see the doctor. Her first concern was my blood pressure but she became less concerned when I told her that I'd been waiting in her crowded waiting room for an hour and a half AFTER having ridden with my husband for the past two hours and had she been me, her blood pressure would be right up there also. Thirty minutes after my first glimpse of the woman, and two punctures later, I was on my way out of the building with a "snoopy" bandaid and a bruised arm. About the only thing I really understood that the woman said was,
1. I am not diabetic, my blood sugar is fine.
2. My body is retaining too much fluid (duh,)
3. My thyroid is suspect? (of what I was not able to decypher)
4. They'll call me with the test results and further instructions.
I have felt all along that I suffer from "deadass disease" for which there is no cure other than a brain transplant which is not covered by my HMO.
Sunday, September 21, 2003
It's Sunday
I actually know it's Sunday because they told me yesterday was Saturday and I know it's not Monday yet cause I didn't have to get up to take Zach to school. Therefore, today I'm on the ball although that could change at any given time.
I am going to piddle around today and do a little housework, a little laundry, and probably take a little nap at some point. I might even stay awake long enough to start a new book since I finished one up last night.
The coming week will be a bit busier than I like because I've got an appointment with a doc in Little Rock tomorrow afternoon (dreading that two hour drive), and I really need to go in and work a few extra hours one day. Then on Friday we'll be going back to Little Rock for another birthday party on Saturday. Jaylen will be 2!
Hope everyone's weekend is going greatly!
I am going to piddle around today and do a little housework, a little laundry, and probably take a little nap at some point. I might even stay awake long enough to start a new book since I finished one up last night.
The coming week will be a bit busier than I like because I've got an appointment with a doc in Little Rock tomorrow afternoon (dreading that two hour drive), and I really need to go in and work a few extra hours one day. Then on Friday we'll be going back to Little Rock for another birthday party on Saturday. Jaylen will be 2!
Hope everyone's weekend is going greatly!
Saturday, September 20, 2003
All You Ever Wanted to Know About HMOs,,,and then some.
Q. What does HMO stand for?
A. This is actually a variation of the phrase, "HEY MOE." Its roots go back to a concept pioneered by Moe of the Three Stooges, who discovered that a patient could be made to forget about the pain in his foot if he was poked hard enough in the eyes.
Q. I just joined an HMO. How difficult will it be to choose the doctor I want?
A. Just slightly more difficult than choosing your parents. Your insurer will provide you with a book listing all the doctors in the plan. These doctors basically fall into two categories -- those who are no longer accepting new patients, and those who will see you but are no longer participating in the plan. But don't worry; the remaining doctor who is still in the plan and accepting new patients has an office just a half-day's drive away, and a diploma from a Third World country.
Q. Do all diagnostic procedures require pre-certification?
A. No. Only those you need.
Q. Can I get coverage for my preexisting conditions?
A. Certainly, as long as they don't require any treatment.
Q. What happens if I want to try alternative forms of medicine?
A. You'll need to find alternative forms of payment.
Q. My pharmacy plan only covers generic drugs, but I need the name brand. I tried the Generic Medication, but it gave me a stomach ache. What should I do?
A. Poke yourself in the eye.
Q. What if I'm away from home and I get sick?
A. You really shouldn't do that.
Q. I think I need to see a specialist, but my doctor insists he can handle my problem. Can a general practitioner really perform a heart transplant right in his office?
A. Hard to say, but considering that all you're risking is the $20 co-payment, there's no harm in giving him a shot at it.
Q. Will health care be different in the next century?
A. No. But if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then.
A. This is actually a variation of the phrase, "HEY MOE." Its roots go back to a concept pioneered by Moe of the Three Stooges, who discovered that a patient could be made to forget about the pain in his foot if he was poked hard enough in the eyes.
Q. I just joined an HMO. How difficult will it be to choose the doctor I want?
A. Just slightly more difficult than choosing your parents. Your insurer will provide you with a book listing all the doctors in the plan. These doctors basically fall into two categories -- those who are no longer accepting new patients, and those who will see you but are no longer participating in the plan. But don't worry; the remaining doctor who is still in the plan and accepting new patients has an office just a half-day's drive away, and a diploma from a Third World country.
Q. Do all diagnostic procedures require pre-certification?
A. No. Only those you need.
Q. Can I get coverage for my preexisting conditions?
A. Certainly, as long as they don't require any treatment.
Q. What happens if I want to try alternative forms of medicine?
A. You'll need to find alternative forms of payment.
Q. My pharmacy plan only covers generic drugs, but I need the name brand. I tried the Generic Medication, but it gave me a stomach ache. What should I do?
A. Poke yourself in the eye.
Q. What if I'm away from home and I get sick?
A. You really shouldn't do that.
Q. I think I need to see a specialist, but my doctor insists he can handle my problem. Can a general practitioner really perform a heart transplant right in his office?
A. Hard to say, but considering that all you're risking is the $20 co-payment, there's no harm in giving him a shot at it.
Q. Will health care be different in the next century?
A. No. But if you call right now, you might get an appointment by then.
Saturday Morning
I'm up. My throat feels like a train wreck looks, my head's stopped up tighter than a bottle of Heiz Ketchup, and my ears are ringing to the beat of the drums pounding in my head. Yep, it's fall alright.
This afternoon we are going to a park to have a little party for Krysten's #5 birthday, which is Tuesday. The day is supposed to be nice so maybe the kids will run themselves ragged and sleep like logs tonight. I'll take some pics and share some here later today.
This afternoon we are going to a park to have a little party for Krysten's #5 birthday, which is Tuesday. The day is supposed to be nice so maybe the kids will run themselves ragged and sleep like logs tonight. I'll take some pics and share some here later today.
Friday, September 19, 2003
Is Something Missing??
I'll keep looking, but someone seems to be missing amongst us.
I'm going to herd this tiny terrorist to bed now. Think sweet thoughts!
I'm going to herd this tiny terrorist to bed now. Think sweet thoughts!
Tidbits
The reason it's so hard to solve a redneck murder is because the DNA is all the same and there’s never any dental records!
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.-Roseanne Barr
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men
invade another country. -Elayne Boosler
I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.
-Gilda Radner
women from the south are graceful/gentle like the branches of a magnolia tree,yet strong as steel to withstand tornados... they are like Steel Magnolias.
I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.-Roseanne Barr
When women are depressed they either eat or go shopping. Men
invade another country. -Elayne Boosler
I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn't itch.
-Gilda Radner
women from the south are graceful/gentle like the branches of a magnolia tree,yet strong as steel to withstand tornados... they are like Steel Magnolias.
I Figgered It Out.
I'm very tired of my naps being interrupted by telemarketers. I think I got the last call I'm gonna from a few of them this week. I let them make their pitch and then I asked them if I could pay for that with Food Stamps. That made for a quick end to the conversation.
Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy
Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.
******************************************************************
I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
******************************************************************
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let'em go, because, man, they're gone.
******************************************************************
Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words "mank"and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's why so is mankind.
******************************************************************
The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
******************************************************************
Consider the daffodil. And while you're doing that, I'll be over here, looking through your stuff.
******************************************************************
If you ever reach total enlightenment while you're drinking a beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.
******************************************************************
It's scary, I can relate to some of this.
******************************************************************
I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.
******************************************************************
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let'em go, because, man, they're gone.
******************************************************************
Maybe in order to understand mankind we have to look at that word itself. MANKIND. Basically, it's made up of two separate words "mank"and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery and that's why so is mankind.
******************************************************************
The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
******************************************************************
Consider the daffodil. And while you're doing that, I'll be over here, looking through your stuff.
******************************************************************
If you ever reach total enlightenment while you're drinking a beer, I bet it makes beer shoot out your nose.
******************************************************************
It's scary, I can relate to some of this.
A Dictionary for Women
Airhead (er*hed) n. What a woman intentionally becomes when pulled over by a policeman.
Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet.
Balance the checkbook (bal*ens da chek*buk) v. To go to the cash machine and hit "inquire."
Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but, he, "made the dinner".
Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand them.
Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n Gotta get married in a church.
Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks.
Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&Ms.
Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game.
Exercise (ex*er*siz) v To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.
Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.
Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician".
Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n Similar to a black hole in space - if he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.
Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breath...push..."
Lipstick (lip*stik) n On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear...!
Park (park) v./n. Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhere and neck." After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and slide.
Patience (pa*shens) n. The most important ingredient for dating, marriage and children. See also "tranquilizers".
Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.
Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.
Zillion (zil*yen) n The number of times you ask someone to take out the trash, then end up doing it yourself ...anyway.
Argument (ar*gyou*ment) n. A discussion that occurs when you're right, but he just hasn't realized it yet.
Balance the checkbook (bal*ens da chek*buk) v. To go to the cash machine and hit "inquire."
Bar-be-que (bar*bi*q) n You bought the groceries, washed the lettuce, chopped the tomatoes, diced the onions, marinated the meat and cleaned everything up, but, he, "made the dinner".
Blonde jokes (blond joks) n. Jokes that are short so men can understand them.
Cantaloupe (kant*e*lope) n Gotta get married in a church.
Clothes dryer (kloze dri*yer) n. An appliance designed to eat socks.
Diet Soda (dy*it so*da) n. A drink you buy at a convenience store to go with a half pound bag of peanut M&Ms.
Eternity (e*ter*ni*tee) n. The last two minutes of a football game.
Exercise (ex*er*siz) v To walk up and down a mall, occasionally resting to make a purchase.
Grocery List (grow*ser*ee list) n. What you spend half an hour writing, then forget to take with you to the store.
Hair Dresser (hare dres*er) n. Someone who is able to create a style you will never be able to duplicate again. See "Magician".
Hardware Store (hard*war stor) n Similar to a black hole in space - if he goes in, he isn't coming out anytime soon.
Childbirth (child*brth) n. You get to go through 36 hours of contractions; he gets to hold your hand and say "focus,...breath...push..."
Lipstick (lip*stik) n On your lips, coloring to enhance the beauty of your mouth. On his collar, coloring only a tramp would wear...!
Park (park) v./n. Before children, a verb meaning, "to go somewhere and neck." After children, a noun meaning a place with a swing set and slide.
Patience (pa*shens) n. The most important ingredient for dating, marriage and children. See also "tranquilizers".
Valentine's Day (val*en*tinez dae) n. A day when you have dreams of a candlelight dinner, diamonds, and romance, but consider yourself lucky to get a card.
Waterproof Mascara (wah*tr*pruf mas*kar*ah) n. Comes off if you cry, shower, or swim, but will not come off if you try to remove it.
Zillion (zil*yen) n The number of times you ask someone to take out the trash, then end up doing it yourself ...anyway.
ON BEING BRAIN DEAD
After I messed around with my blog a bit this morning, I went to the couch for a nap. That lasted a whole 15 minutes then the phone rang. So I decided I was hungry and fixed a little breakfast snack, cold spam sandwich with doritos (very nutritious).
I came back in here and once again looked at the pile of "to dos" on my desk and decided that first I'd better call to see if Mr. Manager, at the local Wal mart store had gotten my fax yesterday. So to the living room to get the phone, back in here, look down and I've got the friggin remote. Back to the living room with remote in hand to get the phone,,back to my desk for the number. I dial, after a dozen rings in customer service, they answer, phone goes dead. &$&#$^%&*&&@^A!! (that's my brain waves cursing).
Is today Friday?
I came back in here and once again looked at the pile of "to dos" on my desk and decided that first I'd better call to see if Mr. Manager, at the local Wal mart store had gotten my fax yesterday. So to the living room to get the phone, back in here, look down and I've got the friggin remote. Back to the living room with remote in hand to get the phone,,back to my desk for the number. I dial, after a dozen rings in customer service, they answer, phone goes dead. &$&#$^%&*&&@^A!! (that's my brain waves cursing).
Is today Friday?
DAMMIT
Ok, I added the title field in my template. I didn't like the test so I went to edit and fixed it. The fix is not showing up so NOW what's up with blogger???
Pulling my hair out, one strand at a time.
Pulling my hair out, one strand at a time.
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