Thursday, August 07, 2003
I'm considering my options here.
In prison, you get three square meals a day.
At home, you cook three square meals a day
and try to get your kids to eat it.
In prison, you get an hour each day in the yard to exercise and mingle.
At home you get to clean the yard up so you can mow it so your kids
can spread more toys all over it so that you can go out and clean it
again because little Jr. can't sleep without his latest lego creation
In prison, you get to watch TV, cable even.
At home, you get to listen to your children fight over the
remote control and get treated to hours and hours of
mindless cartoons thanks to cable.
In prison, you can read whatever you want
and attend college for free.
At home, you get to read weekly readers starring Dick, Jane,
and Spot and worry about how to send Jr. to college and still
be able to eat for the next twenty years
In prison, all your medical care is free.
At home, you have to pawn your mother's silver and fill out
trillions of papers for insurance and hope the doctor
will see you before you die.
In prison, if you have visitors, all you do is go to a room, sit,
talk and then say good-bye when you are ready or your time is up.
At home, you get to clean for days in advance and then cook and
clean up after your guests and hope that they will one day leave
In prison, you can spend your free time writing letters
or just hang out in your own space all day.
At home, you get to clean your space and everyone else's
space, too, and what the heck is free time again?
In prison, you get your own personal toilet.
At home, you have to physically hold the bathroom door shut in order
to keep from having someone standing over you demanding to know how
long till you're done so you can do something for them.
In prison, the prison laundry takes care of all your dirty clothes.
At home, you get to take care of them yourself, plus everybody else's,
and get yelled at because somebody's favorite shirt isn't clean.
In prison, they take you everywhere you need to go.
At home, you take everybody else where they need to go.
In prison, the guards transport all your personal effects
for you and make sure nothing is missing.
At home, you have to lug around everybody else's stuff in your
purse and then wonder who went in it and took your last dollar.
In prison, there are no screaming or whining children or
spouses asking you to do something else for them,
or screaming at you because you didn't.
At home....stop me when I get to the downside of jail, will ya?