If this is what I have to look forward to I'm thinking about passing on it. But then again, I've had moments like these in the past.
An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car
has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to
the dispatcher: "They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake
pedal and even the accelerator!" she cried. The dispatcher said, "Stay
calm. An officer is on the way."
A few minutes later, the officer radios in. "Disregard." He says. "She
got in the back-seat by mistake."
Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years,
they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their
activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards.
One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said,
"Now don't get mad at me .. I know we've been friends for a long time
...but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I
can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is." Her friend glared
at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her.
Finally she said, "How soon do you need to know?"
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car - both could barely
see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an
intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The
woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it. I
could have sworn we just went through a red light." After a few more
minutes, they came to another intersection and the light was red again.
Again, they went right through. The woman in the passenger seat was
almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that
she was losing it. She was getting nervous. At the next intersection,
sure enough, the light was red and they went on through. So, she turned
to the other woman and said, "Mildred, did you know that we just ran
through three red lights in a row? You could have killed us both!"
Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh, no, am I driving?"