Stop reading Glamour and start reading Guns and Ammo.
Consider chocolate a major FDA food group.
Develope a new talent for spinning head around in 360 degree circles.
Retain more water than Lake Superior.
Deny a bad mood as you pop a clip into a semiautomatic and "chambers one."
Buy hubby/boyfriend a new T-shirt-----with a bulls-eye on the front.
When asked to please pass the salt at the dinner table and you blurt out,"All I ever do is give, give, give! AM I SUPPOSED TO DO EVERYTHING?"
Enroll in the Lizzie Borden School of Charm.
Order 3 Big Macs, 4 large fries, a bucket of Chicken McNuggets, and then maul the manager because they're out of Diet Coke.
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