Friday, March 27, 2009

Rain, Rain, Go Away

Rainy days in Arkansas, in the country, in the company of Rednecks, is always an adventure. Even if you have no intention of having an adventurous day, you'd best be sittin' on ready just in case. It's been raining; not constantly, but just enough to make it too wet to be in the fields and too wet to work in the shop yard on the farm. When it's too wet to work I have the privilege of being irritated aggravated aggitated entertained by my Redneck hubby. Being entertained by the Man is not always something the weak of heart can handle,,,for sure.

He went to work this morning around 6 a.m. after waking me up. I did the morning wrangling job of getting the Terrorist up, fed, and ready for school. The bus came for the kids and I went back to bed. I'd been up for the second time for about 1.5 minutes when the Man came back home cause it was too wet to work and before he even got in the door good he remarked,

"You haven't had time to brush your hair yet, huh?" "I'm hungry, whatcha got to cook in here?"

I just stared at him as walked past on his way to the kitchen with the TV remote in his hand changing channels as he went.

Later on, one of his buddies shows up with a tax return for me to do and our neighbor, Jeffrey, comes over too. They're in the living room, I'm in the kitchen doing something, when the phone rings. I heard the Man answer it, and then I heard laughter, so I asked what was going on.

Apparently it was someone calling for the Man to do a farm survey. The Man tells it like this:

Caller: Is Mr. "Man" in today?

the Man: No, he's not here today.

Caller: Are you one of the farmers?

the Man: No, I'm just a man who's here seeing the farmer's wife while he's not home. (this is the part where our two visitors started laughing)

Caller: Oh no, that's just not right! (laughter)

the Man: Oh Man, you're not going to tell on me are you?

Caller: (laughter, laughter) Noooo, of course not, I'm in New York!

the Man: Well ok, have a good day! (hangs up)

By this time, both the guys visiting are laughing their butts off. I told them they weren't helping a damned bit by encouraging him! I'm thinking that survey group won't be calling again for awhile. I swear, it's like being with a 5'11" toddler around company; every time he opens his mouth you hold your breath cause you don't know what might come out.

On Sunday we're going on an adventure.

The man James is working for now has farm ground strung out from Southern Illinois, down to Missouri, on down to President's Island in Memphis, and now even further south to here in East Central Arkansas. The adventure on Sunday will be to go to Memphis to take one of the Mexican tractor drivers to President's Island to drive a tractor and planter back here to the farm.

Presidents Island is just off Interstate 55 after you cross the Mississippi River in Memphis. The route we'll take is almost straight south, right through the southern half of the city. James asked me if I'd go with him to navigate as he leads the tractor through town; I told him I sure would, and I'd take my camera too cause if he gets stopped by the police and they cuff him(we have no idea if it's even legal to drive a tractor on big city streets; the boss said do it so he is), I'm damned sure going to document the moment!

We'll come off the Island, right to the left of the A up there and follow the pink line out of Memphis on down into Mississippi. (click to enlarge the maps)

The trip from Memphis to the farm is about 75 miles or so. It should be an interesting adventure. I'll be sure to take pictures.

I'll be glad when they're back in the field around here!


jazzi said...

I think the photos that might get interesting are the faces of the city people watching a tractor drive through.

Sally said...


Never a dull moment around your place, is there Ms. Brenda?

Have a safe trip~hope y'all don't get no tickets. :)

Andrea (Off Her Cork) said...

I think it is but I think you have to drive close to the shoulder. But I have no idea why I think this so I can't say for certain. :)

Donna said...

HAHahahahahaaaa....I can SEE them now! Sitting around the table, drinking coffee and staring at James while he's on the phone!!!
Gads how Funny!!!lololololol
Another couple hundred miles and you could be having dinner with Us!!!Hahaa...BE SAFE Ya'll!!!hughugs

Donna said...

LOL, I love your little stories! That traveling adventure is going to be REALLY interesting! And I am familiar with that SW side of Memphis. Whoa-doggies, you guys are brave 'cause there are some rough areas in there! Sure hope that you get through this adventure unscathed!

Debbie said...

Being from the South, I get it. Your hubby sounds like a hoot to be around! Hillarious story and I'm thinking your post about the tractor drive is going to be just as good. Can I come?

Butterfly Gardener said...

Adventures on the farm are never dull! I've drove many a tractor down the road, but never through a major city. Everybody wants to gripe bout the slow moving tractors, but they have absolutely no idea how or where their food and clothes come from. Hope everyone is nice to ya'll and noone gives you a "California Howdy" or ticket along the way!LOL

bermudabluez said...

What a freakin' hoot!!! I love your stories!! And life is never dull at your place...never!

Cal said...

Hope your trip goes safely and smoothly!

Tiff said...

Ha!!! I will have to remember that next time we get one of those calls!!!