Monday, December 18, 2006

You Just Might Be A Scrooge,,,

If your only contact with three spirits on Christmas Eve is gin, vodka and bourbon


If you turn on the lawn sprinklers on Christmas Eve to keep carolers away


If you buy all of your Christmas gifts at a store that also sells gas


If your favorite version of "Babes in Toyland" stars Michael Jackson


If you get your Christmas Tree at a rest stop at night


If you give bathroom fixtures as Christmas gifts


If your prized Christmas ornament is Santa Claus shooting the moon


If your favorite Christmas movie is Jurassic Park


If your idea of Christmas dinner is a six pack of beer and a cheese log


If you think "Ho, Ho, Ho" is a line from a Rocky movie


If your best Christmas tradition involves a fire and reindeer meat


If your favorite version of "Silent Night" is sung by OJ Simpson

If your favorite past time is putting defective bulbs in your neighbors' string of Christmas lights or defacing Christmas lawn charicatures with egg nog


And, finally - if your only holiday decoration is a rotting pumpkin

12 comments:

jerri said...

until saturday I actually had 2 rotting pumpkins LMAO just beacause I forgot they were out front

PEA said...

LOL love it!!! Brenda, since I'll be on the road most of this week I want to take this opportunity to wish you and yours a very Merry Christmas!!! Hugs xoxo

Tammy said...

did your Hubby do all this??
:-D

Sally said...

That's so funny! I was actually going buy the kids bathroom fixtures until I found out they already had. :)

Virginia Gal said...

Hi Brenda!

I just got in my first semester grades - all A's!!

I'm sending mega good thoughts for Zach for his term end. Please let him know that many thought I couldn't do it, but I proved them, it was a lot of hard work but so worth it in the end!

cassie-b said...

I'm not overly enamored of the modern Christmas celebrations, but much better than that list. So maybe I'm not so bad after all.
Cas
I always act enthused, and that's not a bad thing.

mary lou said...

LOLOL No Brenda, Your Marlboro Man would not last 30 minutes with me. I'd either kill the SOB or he would be quivering mass of goo in the middle of the floor. You can keep him.
(LORDY could you just SEE that?)

mreddie said...

This same Scrooge might make a good redneck - or at least an average one. :) ec

Pisser said...

Hey, thanks for the tips! ;)

Houston said...

Morning, Brenda,

Houston calling.

Cheers.

Brent said...

"Babes in Toyland" and Michael Jackson...HAHAHAHAHHA!! I really hate him.

kaliblue said...

Brenda,
I just wanted to wish ya'll a Very Merry Christmas and the best for the coming New Year!! :-).