Saturday, October 14, 2006

Put In My Place

I was raised to believe that everyone is entitled to their opinion but this doesn't entitle them to be ugly about it. I've always kept this part of my raising in mind when stating my opinion about any matter of things that may come up in a conversation and just such a conversation occurred the other day that caused me to have to dig deep to take a firm hold of this advice to keep from becoming really ugly.

My husband has an uncle who's the type who'll take anything and turn it into an argument. He's been married about 4 or 5 times and the more I think about it, the more I realize the women probably left him in order to keep themselves out of prison for murder, because the man is an arrogant ass. Actually, he's an ignorant, arrogant ass, and he reminds me so much of my father and oftentimes, my husband.

An ignorant, arrogant, ass is someone who has an opinion about something and insists that their opinion is the only correct opinion that can be true about it. The ignorant adjective is used in order to describe their certainty that they know all the facts about the subject because they read it in a newspaper article once or on the NBC nightly news. (Modern day IAAs have often read one article from an internet site). I'm not saying that there is not much to be learned from such sources but the IAA mostly only uses ONE source in order to make their decision in a matter because they're more interested in having their say and having you agree with them than they are in the truth about anything.

Ok, now for the conversation.

While sitting in the kitchen waiting for time for the visiation for the uncle who is deceased, I was talking with an older lady, man, and my mother-in-law. We were mostly just making small talk but one of them mentioned something about the war in Iraq and how they sure hoped it wouldn't turn out to be another Viet Nam. IAA uncle, who hadn't been doing anything other than his usual staring into his coffee cup, suddenly jumped up from the table and shouted, "I was there! The Viet Nam war was what it was because of YOU people, YOU protested, YOU didn't let us finish the job over there, YOU are to blame for it!"

I almost started laughing at the man. It was such a shock to see someone actually behave like that in front of folks who weren't family, but I noticed how the older lady across the table from me kind of turned pale, over being shouted at like that, so I quickly changed the subject.

Then later on I screwed up and said I didn't like Bush and the man started shouting at me "for being so stupid, and women like me were the reason women shouldn't be allowed to vote!"

In a calm voice I told him that I thought he was in dire need of a brain transplant, and a padded room, then excused myself before he could launch another tirade, and went outside to sit in the swing with my sister-in-law.

Has anyone else had a dressing down from their neighborhood IAA lately?

17 comments:

Tammy said...

What a Goat!!!
There must be one in every family...

Houston said...

I know that personality type well. Most of the time my philosophy is "Don't wrestle with a pig. You're just going to get dirty wrestling with a mad pig. The pig will still be a pig, and still be dirty, but you're going to smell like pigshit and mud.

I also recognize that particular line of b.s. he was spouting. Talk about stupid urban myths! We lost in Vietnam because we couldn't win in Vietnam. The same f**king reason we're losing in Iraq.

cultureshock553 said...

This is a GREAT post, and hilarious, too. When I first bacame a police officer, I honestly believed there was good in everybody. After many years of dealing with idiots, I now believe some people are sub-human (not wrapped tight, waste of good air, wires not connected, etc.), and that if we were birds, we'd push 'em out of the nest, so to speak.

I also believe that MOST people are truly well-intentioned and good at heart.

I always enjoy your blog so much. Thanks for keeping it up.

Sally said...

It's strange that you bring something up that has been on my mind quite a bit lately.

I have a cousin (I love him, really I do) but he is so adamant about certain things, and there is no way in Hades another person could change his mind! And, the funny part is - this is something that was ingrained in him by my uncle, his father. Not one speck of proof to back up his belief. It's nice that he "believed" his father, and honors that belief, but it's danged ignorant that he won't even consider listening to the truth! He doesn't shout, or anything like that. He's just a stubborn goat, and I've given up! So, I guess we'll both go to our graves with this matter unsettled between us. Until recently, I wasn't even positively sure that he was wrong, but now I have it in writing. He doesn't want to see it! His loss.

Sally said...

P.S. These were and are, members of the Good Ol Boy's Club who think women are stupid!! :)

PEA said...

Oh I know a couple of these IAA too!! Nothing you say or do will change their opinion and it's hell for anyone who doesn't agree with him! I usually just walk away from people like that...not worth my time to argue with them. Let them stew in their own little corner of their small minded world!!!

Kathleen Marie said...

I like your IAA description. I know a few. I think we all do.

My husband and I were talking about how people really don't know how to debate. They argue instead. Debating is a lost art. Debating is polite. You listen to me, I listen to you, we compromise or agree to disagree.

I must also say your post made me chuckle a bit as well.

God BLess your heart!

Brent said...

IAAs are so AGRRAVATING, and whom I seem to encounter everyday at work. And I've come to the conclusion that approximately 80% of the American public (or at least people in Des Moines) are IAAs.

mreddie said...

You showed extraordinary patience and I'm glad you are not in jail for doing him bodily harm. :) ec

Joan said...

After this weekend, I came "this" close to puching one of them out.

Joe said...

IAA'S hum... thank you Lord I haven had to face one, retirement has been good! LOL! I'm off this week playing catch up. Have a good one!

Mary Lou said...

LOLOL Sounds like my Brother!!! I take him to his Dr appt every month, about 2 hours away, and he starts in on the GOD DAMNED REPUBLICANS and how they are the reason this country is going to Hell. After about 3 months of taking this and biting a giant hole in my tongue, I pulled off to the side of the road on interstate 5 and said, "You wanna walk the rest of the way?" "You are after all riging in a car with a bush bumber sticker on it, and Yes, I did b=vote for him because I was not going to let that other BAstard win!"

He shut up, and we continued on. Every time he starts in on me, I pull over to the side of the road...

cassie-b said...

What a jerk!

I try hard to stay away from people who are "after me" Sometimes when it's family, you just can't always avoid them.

I guess we all have a person ready to fight over little or nothing.

Leslie said...

I had a relative like that once. She died a miserable, lonely old lady.

Andie Pandie said...

Oh man but do I hate that. UGH! And yeah, if you recall my dinner/dance entry then you might remember I had the most enjoyable time sitting with my sister's father-in-law. :/ Thank god for wine.

Special K said...

Yes, I'm sure your suggestion he needed a brain transplant was "polite." ;)

I [heart] you.

Attila The Mom said...

I haven't had any dressing-downs, but I had a recent run-in with IAAs in my public speaking class.

The assignment was to do a persuasive speech. One young girl did a speech on how people who have disabilities and/or any kind of mental illness shouldn't be allowed to breed.

My son was dumbstruck. I was furious. We barely got back to our car before I went off. LOL