Saturday, April 15, 2006

Just a few little things

Dear Mr. Whoeverthehellisinchargeofcustomerserviceandsatisfaction at this local Wal mart,

When a lady finally finds the "friendly" helper back in sporting goods after she's made 4 trips already, all special like, to see about whether ya'll have gray baseball pants, please ask him kindly if he'll refrain from giving a HUGE sigh for interrupting his conversation with an old school bud. I was determined today to find someone to ask about the availability of this item since on the previous 3 trips there was not a soul to be found in that department. It would also be nice if the "huge display" the young man spoke of were actually a display and not a box holding boxes of these pants stuck back in the sewing fabrics and notions department which has, in my opinion, not a damned thing sporting about it.

Sincerely,

The Wanted Poster Lady


Dear U.S. Postal Service,

I've noticed that along with the increases in postal rates that you insist you must have in order to provide us your services in a prompt and timely manner you are no longer occasionally taking longer than a man on a half dead horse to deliver our mail but managing to take longer than a one-legged man walking, and more frequently. I really do not believe that it should take 10 days for a first class letter to arrive at a destination that's 35 miles away. I'd also like to mention that Christmas card from the Netherlands that finally arrived after only 4 1/2 months. I suppose you had to wait for the winter geese migration for that delivery, huh?

Perhaps if you lit a fire under some asses,,,,,,,just a thought.

Sincerely,

The Irrate Postal Customer



Dear City of West Helena,

Just a note to mention the attempts to increase your city sales tax by another 2 percent and my intention to spend money on gas to drive an additional 15 miles to do my shopping if your attempts are successful.

Sincerely,

Tax Poor and Tired

8 comments:

KB said...

I just love it when you go all Upstanding Citizen!!

So now I have to go read below and see what's been up this tax season. Any interesting stories that I should know about?

Kim said...

Its funny how one always puts a return address, only to never see your letter again should it go missing. I've had mail sent, never received and never returned to me :(

Fuckkit said...

I dunno what its like over there but I know for a fact that a lot of mail in the UK ends up in the bin having been swept up by a large, ugly man with a girls name.

Sally said...

You tell em girl, seems the least we can do. Of couse those letters problably end up in the shredder, like mind did to the Senators. Which reminds me, next time I'm just walking to Tallahasse; maybe do more goodl

Phyllis said...

Have you tried Zoloft? Works wonders for me!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Nikki said...

HA! HA! I did a post on my own blog about how much Walmart can suck entitled "www.dumbass.com". It's a shame that they have sooooo much to complain about.

Anonymous said...

Best regards from NY!
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