Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Guaranteed to Make You Crazy!!

Noah's Ark.

Cause I love Books

And cause Cal asked me to, here's another book meme.

Total Number of Books I Own:
I once owned many, many books but the fire 3 years ago caused me to have to start over. I joined a book club and buy books often so I probably have close to a hundred.


The last Book I Bought:
"She's Not There" by Mary-Ann Tirone Smith, "Slow Death" by Jim Fielder, "Brimstone" by Douglas Preston and Lincoln Child.


Last Book I Read: "Rising Tide" by John M. Berry which was loaned to me by my friend, Houston.

The most recent book I started was: "The Rapids" by Carla Neggers


Five Books That Mean A lot to Me:
"Huckleberry Finn" by Mark Twain, "The Stand, Gerald's Game, The Green Mile" by Stephen King, "Watchers" by Dean Koontz. Every book that I read to the end means a lot to me so the list goes on and on.


Now I pass the challenge onto: Brent, Joe, and KB!

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We had a restful Memorial Day. Can you believe I didn't cook?? Jami and the girls and Jerri and Alexis came over for a little while and then they went home to cook for their hubbies, who were working. Around 3 or so we went to El Canaveral for a late lunch/early supper and then drove down to Storm Creek so Zach could put a pole in the water. The fish weren't biting jigs so we took a drive through the St. Francis National Forrest to the mouth of the St. Francis River where it flows into the Mississippi. It was a relaxing afternoon.


Zach found this snake hanging out under our front porch. It wasn't easy taking the photo cause I was trying to make sure the little begger wasn't going to come near me!






Looking north along the Miss. River at the mouth of the St. Francis River.


heh,heh,heh, guess.


Horners Lake, near the Mississippi River.

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Those Were The Days

Being a mother has been a long road full of surprises. I found out very early, that the life you gave birth to, can reach into your chest, pull out your heart, and tear it into a zillion pieces, but I also learned that, these same children of your loins, can give you such glorious moments of love and laughter that you just pick up the pieces of your heart and keep on loving them.

Occasionally my grown children will own up to things they did as children that they'd gotten away with. Or they'll confess to moments of silliness or fearful situations that they felt too insecure to tell you about back when the events occurred.

My girls were always the most secretive about things that were going on in their lives when they were still living at home. My son, not so much. There were times that I'd stop him in the middle of the tale he was about to tell because there are just some things a mother does not want or need to know if she is to stay out of a rubber room. This past week Jami and James (Bubbie) have had me in stitches will tales of things they'd done in the past.

Jami's confession was about a time when she and her brother had gone out with friends and were supposed to be home at mid-night. She claims they knew they'd be in some "deep shit" if they were late but they let time get away from them and were in a place 30 miles away at exactly 11:30. They were driving my mercury Marq, the one they called the "airplane" because of it's size, and knowing they had to have the most skilled driver of the group to get them home in time, they let their friend, Angie, do the driving.

Angie had great skill in getting to where she needed to be on time because she always waited until past the last minute to leave for school every day and still managed to be there before the last bell rang. Her little brother once said that they'd buckle up and hang on for the trip because the ride was more fun than a roller coaster.

Jami said they took all the back roads to avoid any police that might be out and about but had to be on one of the state highways for a few miles at one point. That was where the state trooper noticed the airplane full of kids zooming along and got after them. She said they turned back onto one of the back roads and lost the trooper,but being kids, didn't realize that they'd been caught anyway cause he'd called in their tags and knew where they were headed. He was waiting for them when the jumped the highway and started down the gravel road leading to our house. Jami swears it wasn't their fault that he was following them too close on the gravel road and that rock hit his windshield. She said they finally decided to stop before they got home because they figured they'd be in LOTS deeper shit if the police car, with blue lights flashing, pulled into our driveway.

She still doesn't know how they avoided going to jail or how they avoided a ticket even, but she said they were at that time of their life when they were much more afraid of the wrath of Momma than they were of an officer of the law.

They made it home only 20 minutes late for which they were grounded for a week. I told her I should ground her now for another week for the close encounter with the law that I never knew about until last week.

Then, yesterday as we were sitting in the yard under a tree talking about things the kids had done when they were small, Bubbie came forth with a confession.

They'd cleared the ditch behind our house where we used to live and the kids would go out back to play in the dirt they'd piled up beside the ditch. Bubbie said he was playing out there one day and found this green snake coming out of the ground and was poking at it with a stick. He said, "I don't know if I was imagining this or exactly what it was, but the snake rolled over on it's back and then raised his head up and looked at me. It wasn't like any snake I'd ever seen! It's eyes weren't on the sides of it's head, but in the front. And it had teeth that stuck out to the front and it looked right AT me, it was so weird!"

The rest of yesterday afternoon, Jerri and I took every opportunity we could to bring the "buck-toothed" snake incident into our conversations. I guess I understand why my son didn't tell us about it way back when.

Did you ever do anything as a child that your parents didn't know about until you were grown?

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Whew!

Long day!

I was looking forward to sleeping in this morning until they informed me that the first All Star practice was this morning at 9 a.m. Getting myself up wasn't nearly as hard as getting the Terrorist on his feet.



The practice lasted until nearly 12 so I've had more than my share of UV rays today. I was as tired as if I'd been out there chasing those balls so when I got home I had to take a quick little nap after I put some steaks in a marinade.

Bubbie stopped by on his way home from work and Jerri and the Chick met him here and PopPop cooked steaks and some shrimp (for me!) on the grill. Pops did a little irrigating of his garden too, with his little helpers.






Hmmm,,cool water,,should I?



Mommy said no so I'll just stir it around a little with this bat.

Friday, May 27, 2005

I just thought baseball was almost over.

It seems that our terrorist has been chosen to be on the All Star team this year. I think they'll be playing in tourniments ALL SUMMER.

I see a lot of driving in my future.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Here's the newest kindergarten graduate!


Krysten Leann



Now to get through the ballgame tonight and then tomorrow I'm gonna mildew.

I'm Gonna Get Movin In a Minute.

I'm just moving a bit slow today. I will have to leave around 11:30 so I can find a parking place to attend Krysten's kindergarten graduation then pick Zach and his baseball buddy up and try to keep them from killing each other with play, then later on, get them dressed for their ball game this evening. It's a late game so it'll be another rush to get home tonight, get baths, and get the terrorist to bed in preparation for his last day of school tomorrow.

I'll be back later with photos.

Ya'll have a good un!

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Redneck Riveria

Whilst paying a visit to The Pissed Kitty the other day, one of her entries brought to mind my first REAL experience with shore-nuff cockroaches. Before my first trip to the Redneck Riviera (down there where the Bama and Florida line meet on the Gulf), although I'd seen the occasional cockroach, I found that I was completely misinformed about this creature of the insect world in that I thought if you've seen one roach, you've seen em all.

I was wrong.

Down there in the damp and humidy and the brisk gulf breezes they grow those critters Biggie-sized and after my first encounter with one of those Godzilla appearing monsters, I spent a good part of my restful vacation trying to make sure one of them didn't sneak into my purse or bag ,or anydamnthing of mine, to come home with me and start a breeding program. We only have those nasty, little cockroaches here and I won't even bring a paper bag, box, or potato container, into the house without inspecting the hell out of it. I can't imagine anyone having a bug problem with creatures as big as those gulf-grown ones. They'd keep you up all night banging around the pots and pans!

Anyway, back to the first encounter.

We'd gone down for a few days of get-away time to stay in a condo at Orange Beach and since hubby and some of the other farm managers had been down there previously for a few days of "drunk and disorderly", compliments of one of the chemical companies, he wanted to take me over to Perdio Key to see the FloraBama Lounge and Package Store. I'd heard many tales about this joint, but it's one of those places that you have to actually visit to really experience it. Actually it looks like a total dump but it's one of the rockinist places on the beach.

The first visit was about mid-day and I was hungry so I ordered some of their huge shrimp to have with my beer.
The photo shows them being served on a paper plate but they musta been out of them when I was there cause mine were served on a piece of paper bag. Those were some fine eatin there folks! I wasn't too overly impressed with the place but it was mid-day and hubby told me they didn't get wound up till later in the day.



So we returned the next evening.

We walked around a bit, as much as we could in the crowd, and then settled at a picnic table in one of the back rooms that had a tarp ceiling with pvc pipe roof supports to listen to a little band that was playing in that part of the place. (there were about 6 different bands playing around there that evening).



After several beers and lots of great music, I noticed movement out of the corner of my eye and thinking that it was a fella's feet on another level of the floor, (steps led to a bar above our heads and this plank was stretched across up there so they could watch the band too) I turned my head and found myself looking eyeball to eyeball with one of the biggest damned bugs I'd ever seen in my entire life. Then I noticed he had friends with him. Then I started looking all around the picnic tables and stuff and noticed there were others!!

The fact that the crowd was sharing the place with Godzilla cockroaches didn't seem to bother anyone else cause there were folks wearing everything in there from pearls and diamonds to cut-offs and swimsuits, but even the 6 pack of beer I'd consumed didn't keep me from being leary so I saw an open spot at a table in the center of the room and grabbed my cigarette case and told hubby we were moving out in the open.

After about 3 more beers, a couple of margaritas, and some iced coffee, liquor concoction, I was able to relax a little (but I still wouldn't lay down my cigarette case for fear one of those things would hitch a ride in it) and settled down to party with the roaches. I reckon they were enjoying the music too cause they didn't even try to hide or anything like most bugs do.

I was proud that I was drunk when I remembered eating the shrimp off that paper sack in there the day before.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

It's Graduation Time

We attended our nephew, Josh's, graduation last night and James's cousin, Jenna, also walked across that stage to get her diploma. Those sure were two happy youngsters to be done with that part of their lives but I sure wanted to tell them a few wise words about these being the best of days. I kept it to myself though because I believe that each of us has to take our own steps in life and they wouldn't have listened to me any more than I would have one of my elders way back when.

Josh's parents, my brother and sister-in-law, have been through hell and back and I fear that because of this they're clinging so tightly to Josh that it's going to end up in heartbreak. Their oldest son, Shane, was killed in a car accident at age 20 when Josh was only 10 so you can imagine how near and dear to their hearts they hold their remaining children. But I hope they will soon realize that denying them freedoms to explore and do the things that a child needs to do to become an adult can also become a tradgedy. While we want to keep them in the nest it's in their nature to spread their wings to fly.


Congratulations Josh!!

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I set the timer and snapped a photo before we left for the graduation since we were all spiffed up and stuff. See the little monkey in the middle?

Monday, May 23, 2005

When Will I Ever Learn?

There will probably soon be a reprint of my WalMart wanted poster. This one will sport horns and ears emitting smoke and fire. The fuckers!

On Saturday afternoon I needed to do a little shopping so hubby, Zach, and I went to town. We stopped in for a late lunch/early dinner at El Canaveral cause I like to put off my visits to WalMart as long as I possibly can. Since we needed BBs, anti-itch spray, and one of those cool Colgate toothbrushes Special K spoke of, a trip to one of only 2 grocery stores in town wasn't in the cards cause they don't sell most of that stuff. So away we go to the local Wally World.

I should have seen the signs of forewarning when we went to the front to check out and there was noone waiting in line at one of the counters. Things are going smoothly except for the young gal deciding to wipe off the counter belt with something wet just as we're unloading our basket. I finally remembered to buy sugar so I had to stack that on top of another item to keep from having a wet bottom on the bag. Then when the gal gets to the 12-pk of Bud Light we have to wait 10 minutes for the manager, who's standing within throwing distance (don't think I didn't have an urge to), to notice the flashing sign above our checker indicating that she needed help cause our checker wasn't old enough to scan the beer.

So finally I write out the check for $103.07 for the items and we made out way out the door. I was almost smiling over the fact that, even though we'd had a couple of delays, we'd managed to get through the check out in less than the usual half hour!

Then we drove our 12.5 miles home and unloaded the bags and as I was merrily putting the stuff away (as I muttered curses under my breath about the sugar being bagged with the chicken) I noticed a few things were missing. I went back out to the truck to see if we'd missed a bag or two but they weren't there. So I dug around in my purse for the receipt and find that although I had paid for several items, they didn't make it into carry-out basket at the check-out.

Although I'd bought

Anti-Itch Spray for $6.37
Toothpaste for $2.37
Colgate Toothbrush for $2.88
Deodorant for $1.94 and $1.98
Baby Powder for $2.82
and Soap for $4.44

Those items were not to be found.

So I called WalMart to discuss this with the manager but the manager was not in. The assistant manger informed me that there was nothing that could be done until Monday.
At this point I was pissed enough to pull nails from a 2X4 post with my teeth!

I called today and was finally able to speak to the manager and I told him that since I had been waiting since SATURDAY to be able to use my purchased products and I was quite sure they didn't want me to have to make another 25 mile round trip to their store in the mood I was in, it would be in their best interest to send one of their trusty employees on out here to the country to deliver my missing purchases. He immediately agreed to this suggestion.

I hope it's one of the ones that drives a shiney new car cause it just rained out here on these gravel roads!

Saturday, May 21, 2005

Grumble!

Someone called this morning before 7. Someone called this morning TWICE before 7. I finally gave up and got up the second time but didn't make it to the phone before they'd hung up. They woke the bird up too so there's no going back to bed for me.

Anyone can look at me and tell that I need all the beauty sleep I can get!

Thursday, May 19, 2005

I'm Over the Hump.

Wednesday is done and now it's on to Thursday and I woke up thinking (wishing) it was Friday. I can sleep till I wake up on Saturday mornings so coming to the realization that it wasn't yet Friday was a little let-down. At least I have that to still look forward to.

Zach had ball practice last night so we had another rush evening afterwards to try to get home, get food, and get him bathed and in bed. On practice days and early ballgame days, while school's still going on, he's bringing one of his team buds home with him cause his Momma works in town and has a hard time getting him there on time on those days. So yesterday this Nanny had two little chattering, wiggly, lads to herd to practice. It actually went smoother since Zach had someone to play with and wasn't so grumpy from being tired after a long day at school. Tonight they have a ballgame so we'll see how it goes with getting two of them dressed.



It's so nice to be able to do the regular Nanny things with the rest of the grandbabies. Since Zach lives with us, it's not in our best interest to buy him things that make a mess or make a lot of noise. (I'm not totally dense in this area).
It's a different matter when it comes to little presents for the others.

JC Penny had a sale on "Pixi Dust" make-up kits back in the winter so knowing that I had 3 little girls with birthdays during the Spring, I ordered 3 of them knowing that they were not staying at my house (see how clever I can be?). I so enjoy hearing the stories about MeriKate doing makeovers on her cat and, under protest, their family dog. The cat adores MeriKate and will lie patiently in her lap as she applies eyeshadow, lipstick, and blush, the dog has to be bribed and held down by an assistant.



I'd love to go back to bed this morning since I stayed up too late last night finishing up a good book but I need to call the beauty salon to see if Ms. Bea can fit me in for a trim today. I also have to call the satellite folks to see if I can get Zach's TV back on track. But if Ms. Bea can't fit me in I think I'll do the satellite later and snooze for a couple more hours. At my age, extra beauty sleep can't hurt you know.

Ya'll have a good one!



A 10:15 opening at the salon kept me from going back to bed but now I've been snipped so I'm off for a nap!

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Not much going on in my neck of the woods.

With all this rest I'm getting you'd think my house would be spic-n-span but it just ain't so. I don't know where to start so I start everywhere and run out of go juice and finish nothing.

Zach had another ball game this evening but it was a later one and we didn't have to leave home till around 6. After the game comes the mad rush to get home, get supper, and herd him to the tub so he can get to bed at a decent time. That boy hates to get up in the mornings worse than I do. One and a half more weeks and we'll both sleep till we want to get up.

The Chick and her Mommy and Daddy were here on Saturday and James (PopPop) went to the door to go outside. Chickie jumped down off the couch and ran behind him, shook her finger at his back and said, "PopPop, you've got to fix my damn Gater!" It seems my son had been telling Jerri that he hoped those parts came in so he could fix "that damned Gater", and the Chick was paying more attention than they thought. The poor baby only got to ride it a few times before the gear messed up so I guess she decided to take matters into her own hands and see about having it fixed if Daddy wasn't getting around to it fast enough.

Jerri thought last summer that she was going through the "terrible twos" early but boy was she wrong! She's right on schedule and making her Mommy a very tired lady.

I went out to say hello to Willie and Tee today and took a photo for you. I didn't let them out of their kennel cause those are two hyper hunters and my old ass can't talk them back into the pens. All James has to do is whistle and they go right back in, not so with me. They look at me like I'm stupid and keep on going.


Willie and Tee

I also took a couple of photos of the flowering moss that I planted in my flower boxes on the front porch. They aren't growing much yet.





That's it for today. Just another one of them lazy days here in L.A.

Monday, May 16, 2005

I need a prescription for this!

Yes indeedy I do!! I wonder if the doc has samples of it for me to try?



I'd probably become addicted and then wouldn't care about my looks or bathing habits. I'd end up living in an alley, in a cardboard box, having my dinners from the dumpsters behind Wendy's.

Sunday, May 15, 2005

A Weekend Outdoors

We haven't been inside much the past couple of days. It's just been so nice outside, although today was about 15 degrees cooler than yesterday.

Thursday, May 12, 2005

It's Already Thursday.

This week has passed by in a foggy blur and I see the weekend hoovering right over the horizon. It started out with disappointment but a little hope and moved on to resignation and a deep sadness mixed with anger which are the only emotions a thief can leave you with. All I wanted to do was replace a 38 yr old couch and get a coffee table with rounded edges cause those sharp corners aren't good with a new baby coming who'll be learning to toddle around it.

And I worked for that money, dammit.

There was a nice little surprise in the guise of a phone call on Tuesday evening. When I put the phone to my ear I heard this excited voice say, "I'm looking for Brenda who was born in '54 or '55 and went to school at Moro, this is Becky Reese." You could have knocked me over with a concrete feather as that voice from the past chattered in my ear. Although much more mature, it had been fully 37 years since I'd last heard Becky's voice and there she was on the line telling me that she was trying to gather our old school mates together for a homecoming in early October.

Becky is a special person in that she's never mentally aged much beyond the age that we were back then so that made this call even more exciting for me since she was able to ask the right people the right questions to find me. When she'd pause in her giggles to be able to talk, she told me, with her amazing memory, where different ones were that we'd been in school with more than a decade plus quarter century ago in that little elementary school in that tiny little rural town. I think she must have remembered that crush I had on Stanley Baker way back when because she told me at least 3 times that he lived in Texas now.

Stephanie lives in Wynne.

Paula, who's gone through more husbands than anyone can count, is living back in Moro and her husband is a Sunday School teacher.

Leonard has the parts place/service station in town (the only one).

Naomi lives in Marianna.

And the list went on. Very few of them ventured very far from home, or if they did, they returned to what was familiar after awhile. At least 2 of our classmates have died and I mentioned to her the old class photo taken in 7th grade where those two were sitting one in front of the other when the photo was made. I hope to someday have another copy of that photo since mine was lost.

So, in the fall, I'll be taking the photo album of my kids and their babies to the little town where I lived and went to school from the 1st through 7th grades so I can share what's been going on in my life over these many years. It's not far in miles but it's quite a distance in memories.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Grab that fire extinguisher

And go over to see that Special K to wish her a Happy Birthday.




HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIZ SPECIAL K, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!


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I added a few of new photos to my Whats UP Photo site if ya'll wanna go take a gander.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Ya-Ya loves his newest toy but I'm ready to take a hammer to it. Every time he does the perv thing to his perch the rythmic ding,ding,ding,ding,ding,,,makes me CRAZY.


What? What'd I do?

Monday, May 09, 2005

What can go wrong,,,will.

I'm so sick I feel like going to bed and pulling the covers over my head and staying there forever. Sometime between Saturday around noonish and this morning all the money I'd been hording to put towards a couch and coffee table disappeared from my wallet. I've torn my purse and my house apart looking for it in case one of the kids thought it would be fun to play with it and found nothing. I just don't know what happened to it and it makes me ill.

Fuck saving, spend the hell outta it and be done.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!!!

I hope all the Mommies out in blogland had a super day today. My day was a really good one. My oldest daughter, Trish, called last night to chat awhile and it always makes me feel good to hear from her. Zach gave me a little flower he grew and a card and tissue rose that he made. Jami, Keith and the girls brought a pot of begonias by for me to enjoy until I murder them, and Bubbie and Jerri came over with the Chick who brought me a bag of corn as my "prize". My mother-in-law dropped in for a visit and James's brother and his wife stopped in for a bit so it's been a full day of family around here.

I also made it through the entire day without changing out of my night shirt and an old pair of shorts.

Yep, it was a good day.



Saturday, May 07, 2005

Not So Mexicali Rosie

It sure was nice for hubby to suggest that we go out for a meal at our local (only) Mexican restaurant last night. It wasn't so nice to be awakened at 6:30 this morning by Juan Valdez stomping grapes (or is he the one who wacks the coffee beans?) in my intestines while I'm trying to get my beauty sleep. I was calling old Juan a few choice words this morning.

If I've got to be singing the blues over a man south of the border I'd prefer a Jose over a Juan I think.

Friday, May 06, 2005

Barton School Graduating Class of 2015.

Aren't they about the cutest bunch of little guys and gals you've ever seen?
They had their Barton Cub Olympics today at the school and I snapped a few photos of Zach's second grade class with their teacher Mrs. Rutland.

Who IS This Person?

One who's always available, with camera in hand, for the best of the best of photo opportunities. I should be so lucky!


Oops!


I wonder if he got his grant?


And I thought little leaguers put on a good show.


I reckon the southern habit of leaving off the undies to keep cool
was not such a good idea in this case huh?
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Last evening I was in a half-ass good mood because although Zach had a ball game, it was an early ball game, and I could look ahead to not having to rush home to get dinner on the table and him in the bath before bedtime.

The mood didn't last.

Around 6:45 I was huffing my way to the truck toting my purse and Zach's batting helmet and glove while steering him in the same direction and when I arrived I found not 1, but 3 cars, parked behind me in the parking lot. The first was a truck and he was even too close (like 6 inches from my back bumper) to do my cuttin and cussin maneuvers to get out so I go back to the gate to ask them how I was supposed to find the owner so he could move the vehicle. (I figured once he was out of the way I could do the c&c and get out past the others). They said I needed the deputy sheriff to handle it so off I plodded to find him and eventually did. The deputy called in the tag number and got a name and went back to search 4 different game bleachers to find the dumbass that had the nerve to block a bunch of cars.

Evenutally some, "I think I look so cool" lookin dude come strolling out, jiggling his keys and asks, "Oh? Did I block you in?" I promise I tried to hold it in, I was even biting my tongue for real, but I was hungry, and tired, and the devil seems to have set up house on my right shoulder, so I replied, "Yep, and I know yer name,,,I shoulda just told the deputy that I'd handle it and called the tow truck for ya."

After he moved his truck I backed out as far as I could (remember, there were still 2 cars parked behind me blocking my escape), and then I started doing my c&c thing. I drive an extended cab truck so this is no easy deal since there were also cars parked on either side of me and it's hard to judge just how close I am. After about 15 minutes of the C&C and a few prayers thrown in for good measure, I noticed some lads nearby and called to one of them to ask if he'd stand there and let me know when I was getting too close. I'd pull up a few inches till he gave me a sign, then he'd go to the back and we'd do the same. After 15 more minutes of this, he yelled over to a buddy to ask if he'd stand at the back and help out. He was such a good Buddy that he said, "Fuck that broad" and went on yapping to some girls in a car.

Then the guy in the first truck blocking me comes back with his girlfriend and started mouthing off. I was plenty busy trying not to do damage to 3 vehicles but I yelled to them to stay right there and as soon as I got out of that hole, we'd have a long discussion.

The young lad and I finally got my long, black, Ford outta that hole and to my amazement, the mouthy guy and his lady were no longer in sight. I gave the lad $10 and a thank you and told him to buy a six-pack and if he shared it with that little smart-mouthed friend of his, I'd find him and kick his ass.

It was almost 8 when I got home and I wasn't in a good mood!

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Once Upon a Time,,,,

The females outnumbered the males in my family 2 to 1. I looked around last night, after I'd sat in pee for the 100th time in the past 8 years, and realized that it ain't true anymore. I'm outnumbered around here and just one of me (me being the only female) just ain't enough to keep up with all demands of the 3 males in my household.

There are two bathrooms and you'd think they'd pick one and do their missing in that one, preferably the one without the carpet. Nope, they believe in leaving the little surprises in both and a sleepy Nanny, whose eyes don't normally open just to use the pot, never learns. I truly think that, in the process of evolution, the male of our species must have skipped a step or two. Most likely a major one, where it's no longer necessary to spray or dribble urine in order to mark your territory.

Ya-Ya the bird is even getting in on the demands. He has this certain tweety, twerp that he uses to let me know he's ready to be uncovered in the mornings and will get quite insistent if I don't get right to it. He raises 9 kinds of hell at night if I don't cover the cage at precisely 9 o'clock. Don't ask me how he learned to tell time. He's going through his birdy adolescence too, he does all sorts of perverted things to his perch and cage toys. Zach hasn't asked any questions about these new activities, thank goodness, cause I am not sure how I'd explain since he did ask me how I could tell Ya-Ya was a male since he didn't have a "pecker", and to tell you the truth, I know nothing about the sexual organs of birds and I'd hate to admit to an 8 yr old I was stupid in that department.

And what is it with men/boys and mud and dirt? Is it really that impossible to work/play and not get down and roll in the stuff? They're doing better about not tracking it all through the house but I noticed the grown man of the house bringing the shoes that he'd taken off at the door the night before, because they were muddy, to the nearest chair to sit and put them on. Mud dries, makes dirt, right?

Then there's the lying. Yep, the big one does it too. I can almost understand the shorter one trying it cause he's got to learn that telling a lie will get you caught every time and there's twice the punishment then (for doing whatcha did and for lying about it). And he hasn't quite learned yet that this Nanny is the all-knowing one when it comes to spotting a tall tale. But the big un is too big for the fly-swat so what's his point?

Female tall tale spotter: When you glued the handle on that jug you found, did you do it on the kitchen counter?

Grown Male: Why? (see, here's where they cause the antenna of the female tall tale spotter to twitch, answering a question with a question is the first sign of guilt).

Female tall tale spotter: Cause there's glue on the counter and I can't get it off.

Grown Male: I didn't do it, I glued the jug,,so and so,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

At this point the Female tall tale spotter has tuned him out because she's heard so many of these tall tales and knows that even if he's backed into a corner he'll deny it till he dies.

Hopefully some of my male readers will explain some of these species traits for me so I will finally know these age-old questions. I'd be much beholden.

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

A Little This 'N That

Zach had another ball game last night and Nanny near bout froze her hinny off trying to watch it. Instead of keeping an eye on the score I was watching the minutes tick off the clock and thinking about a warm truck and getting home. They lost again but they're looking better with every game.
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Trish called yesterday to ask for advice about how to deal with Jaylen's (her youngest) tantrums because they're making her insane. My advice was, "Insanity is ok, you have to be insane to have kids you know." Jordan, her oldest, is turning out to be quite the softball player and got a homerun the other night. I hope we'll get a break after Zach gets out of school later this month to get over to Little Rock to see one of her games.
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Jerri really missed an opportune kodak moment last weekend while her camera was at home on the charger. They went to a crawdad cook with some of the Chick's daddy's friends and they had a band there playin. The Chick was singing and dancing so much that the band put her up there with them and handed her a mic. Jerri said she really put on a show and even sang one of her favorites, "Happy Birf Day To Youuuuuu".
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I'm staying my happy ass around home today and listening for the sounds of tractors coming down the road. One or more of those idiotic tractor drivers knocked my mail box off 3 times last week and I'm ready to move in for the kill. When I can remember to buy a new mail box I'm gonna put a sign on the post somewhere mentioning that the owner has a shotgun.

That's about all the news I've got for a Wednesday morning. Ya'll have a good one, ya hear?

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Remembering Things

When my sisters and I were young we had our favorite colors and many things that belonged to us were recognizable by their colors because we insisted on these signature colors as a means of identification. When our Aunt Ruth asked us one year what color we wanted our Christmas present to be we had a ready answer. My answer was blue, Paulo's was yellow, and terries was pink and with these replies, although we didn't know what the present would be, we knew the color and would wait in anticipation to see what would be under the tree. That year she surprised us with hand-made pajama bags which were made like little round pillows with a silhouette of a cat sew to the top. I still had that little pillow until April 2002 when it was destroyed by the fire.

My grandmother always tried to please us with hand-made dresses in our signature colors and I have fond memories of her sitting in the bedroom in front of the old singer sewing machine with it's foot pedal, patiently making our Sunday School dresses out of gingham and seersucker material that she'd saved the money to buy.

These memories brought other memories of favorite dresses that come so clearly to my mind as I sit here. Although not blue, I had one dress, also sewn by my grandmother, that was brown with a pattern of little beige flowers scattered all over it. The skirt of the dress was straight and the bodice had a high neck with a tiny ruffle around the neck made from the same fabric as the dress and the sleeves were long. I loved that dress and it made me so sad that I was only able to wear it for a few months because I had a major growing spurt over the summer and it wouldn't fit anymore by the time school started in the fall.

When I was in Jr. High school, while living in England with my father in the late 60's/early 70,s, I had a blue, wool, pleated, mini skirt and pastel stripped sweater that I adored. I remember wearing it when our literature class went to London on a day trip in the early spring of 1969. It was to be the last time I'd ever wear that skirt because on the bus trip home I started my period and a spot got on the skirt and no amount of cleaning would take it out.

The only other dress I remember from those times was a borrowed dress that I wore for the Jr. prom when I was asked by an "older, young, man" even though I was just a 9th grader. I felt so totally elegant and grown up in a peach, organdy, sheath that fell to my ankles. It was a little difficult to dance in that thing so I'm sure if any photos of me were taken during that prom, it was with the skirt hoisted up past my knees so I could get my groove on to the music.

It's funny how some things will come back with such clarity because I can still see those little beige flowers scattered across that brown dress.

Monday, May 02, 2005

I'd rather be sleeping this morning.

Instead, I've already cooked an egg for the terrorist, instructed him in the art of putting his clothes on, and inspected his teeth. I'm sitting here now with my 2nd cup of coffee wondering if I'll die before the great grandchildren start to arrive and one or more of them decide to move in, or if someday I'll be able to sleep till I wake up. He's got 10 more years of school and I know from experience that he'll be abusing this Nanny alarm clock for every one of those years.

Some mornings I'm just tired from the get-go.

I thought about only letting one eye open this morning and going back to bed after the school bus runs but then I remembered the banking that I was supposed to do on Friday or Saturday didn't get done so it has to be done today. And I need to buy a few more grocery items since the $174 I spent on Friday didn't cover everything.

Ok, I'm done whining and it's time to refill my cup.

Hope ya'll have a kind and generous day!

Sunday, May 01, 2005

What a wake up nudge.

I crawled my old, lazy butt outta the bed this morning, got my first cup of coffee, and came to sit in my little office to see what was going on in the world. Just as I got the old dial-up to connect me, around 7:38 a.m., I felt the house start doing a rolling sorta motion, my blinds all started clattering, the pictures on the wall did a swaying dance, and Ya-Ya started totally freaking out.(even more so than the morning I knocked his cage over with him in it).

After I took a walk outside to make sure noone was within viewing range who might be dynamiting a ditch or something, or the neighbor's St. Bernard wasn't doing a tap dance on my deck, I decided there must have been an earthquake somewhere along the New Madrid Fault since we often get little jolts from those.

I went to the TV to see if Austin Aunich had any news to share about a possible earthquake and eventually he did. It appears that there was 4.1 quake around Manila, AR which is about 120 miles north of here (as the crow flies).

It's nice to be greeted on a May 1st Sunday with a slight earthquake huh?